[audio; phone]

[wirsinddiejager]

[For a few moments, there's nothing but faint shuffling noises. Then:]

Is it on? Oh thank fuck somebody help, I'm- oh fuck-

[There's a thud, followed several minutes of swearing and ragey noises.]

Goddammit, just get me out of this thing ARGHRHGH-

[It goes on for like that for a while.]

Comments

voice;

[schild]

[ It just gets louder and louder... ]

Okay, what is it? Did you get stuck in your gear?

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

I WOKE UP IN A PAPOOSE

voice;

[schild]

A papoose?

[ Snerk. ]

Wait, like the kind to carry kids in?

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

JUST SHUT UP AND HELP ME.

voice;

[schild]

[ HE MIGHT ECHO FROM THIS IF HE DOES. For now he's smiling REALLY SMUGLY it's a good thing he's on voice, not video. ]

Okay, tell me your address and I'll go help you.

voice;

[drama8om8]

Psst! Ryan. Bara Ryan. Take pictures.

voice;

[schild]

I'm not taking pictures, Octavia. Your boyfriend deserves some decency.

[ Oh, but he'll take pictures. If only to show Bertholdt. ]

voice;

[drama8om8]

My boyfriend is partway through illustrating my fanfiction. You owe him nothing.

voice;

[schild]

Point.

[ uh-oh, Alan... ]

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

SHE MADE ME DO IT I DIDN'T WANT TO

voice;

[drama8om8]

ALAN HUNTER ARE YOU SAYING MY LITERARY ACCOMPLISHMENTS ARE NOT WORTHY OF YOUR ARTISTIC EMBELLISHMENT

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

YOU MADE ME DRAW YAOI HANDS

voice;

[drama8om8]

HANDS ARE HARD OKAY I COULDN'T DRAW THEM MYSELF YAOI HANDS ARE A LEGITIMATE STYLISTIC CHOICE ALAN WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

BUT IT'S NOT MY STYLE

voice;

[drama8om8]

IF YOU WANT TO DRAW YOUR GAY SOULBOND DADS BOINKING IN YOUR OWN DISTINCTIVE PERSONAL STYLE THAT CAN BE TRACED BACK TO YOU, BE MY FUCKING GUEST

voice;

[wirsinddiejager]

IT'S [INSERT ADDRESS HERE] PLEASE BE QUICK

voice-->action;

[schild]

Alright, alright.

[ HERE COMES BARADAD...!! Well more like he's just gonna drive his care to your place and ring the bell... and maybe just go in when no one answers because Alan said he was in trouble!!! ]

Uh, Alan? You here?

action;

[wirsinddiejager]

[Yeah the ragescreaming coming from an upstairs room should make it pretty easy to pinpoint Alan's location.]

RYAN IS THAT YOU

action;

[schild]

[ That is indeed some loud ragescreaming. Ryan follows it to the source, no problem.

....And there's Eren. Tied in a very familiar-looking papoose. Try not to flinch, Ryan. ]

Wow, you're really... tied up there.

[ Give him a sec, I mean he's wearing sunglasses indoors this is your chance to call him a loser. ]

action;

[wirsinddiejager]

[Oh, he's taking that chance. He's in a bad mood and people have been laughing at him, he needs to take it out somehow.]

And you look incredibly lame with those sunglasses.

action;

[schild]

Yeah, well. Do you really wanna see why I'm wearing 'em?

[ He'll show you too. Because he's an idiot. Also Ryan kneels down, working at the papoose to rip Eren free. ]

action;

[wirsinddiejager]

What, you have an actual reason?

[Alan does what he can to help with freeing him. It should be fairly simple, though his prior struggling has tangled the papoose up with his sheets quite a bit.]

action;

[schild]

I didn't suddenly lose my sense of fashion or something, y'know.

[ Yeah you've made quite a knot here, Alan. Ryan's sunglasses are actually kinda sliding down his nose while he kneels down for this. Ugh, fine, time to take them off to reveal... glowing eyes. Not Armored-Titan-esque yet, but his eyeballs are undeniably glowing like eye-sized flashlights, especially when it comes to his irises. Makes it easier to see where things have gotten tangled, though. ]

Here we go, almost there... Wonder who tied this originally-- they did a real good job of making it so you couldn't get out.

[ that's because it was you, Reiner. ]

action;

[wirsinddiejager]

...Whoa.

[Those sure are some glowy eyes there. Alan can't help staring a little, though he shakes himself out of it once the last knots are undone.]

Whoever did it, I hope they had a good reason.

[Because he kind of remembers being papoosed up on Bertl's back, and they were friends, weren't they?]

action;

[schild]

You should see me at night. [ Scary as hell!! ] Courtesy of our pals, the weird glowing lights. Wouldn't be able to explain these at work, that's for sure.

[ Ryan tucks his sunglasses into the neck of his shirt. Yep, he's one of those guys. Total prep. ]

Hope so. You gonna be alright? Maybe past-you was a naughty kid.

[ Terrible timing for jokes, Ryan. TERRIBLE. ]