002 :: text

[arrowpoint]

[It's text today for Liam, since there's something he doesn't want the network to see.]

Okay I realize aliens are historic and important, and I should probably be more excited right now, but what the fuck is happening to my ears? They're growing or something.

[Growing points, but whatever, let's not advertise that.]

I think I screwed up somewhere. They were sore so I put on a chili pepper extract that I use for my calve muscles after hikes, and now they're just burning like all hell. What can I do to get this stuff off them? Bread?

Comments

[sylvanguard]

[Its a good thing that this is a text, because she is having a hard time not giggling. Who puts chili stuff on their ears?!]

Water. Have you tried water? You know rinsing the chili powder or whatever it is off your ears? It sounds like you're suffering from the same thing that happened to me. Sorry Bro.

[arrowpoint]

Seriously I caught your ears? Totally not cool.

I thought about water but they say it makes the oil spread so...

video; private

[lordofimladris]

[This time the headband he was wearing before is off, his own pointed ears showing. Welcome to the club, Liam.]

I recommend dish soap and not attempting that again.

video; private

[arrowpoint]

[He'll turn on the video for the him, since it appears as if he's got the same issue, and he's a doctor. Say hello to Liam's pointy red ears.]

Right, okay, I'll try that.

[He runs off suddenly, and comes back later with a wet head and a towel rubbing at his ears.]

...Um, okay it's... better, at least.

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[hustru]

No white bread.

[arrowpoint]

Why not? You're supposed to eat bread for spicy food.

[feastorfamine]

All of the home remedies I know for ear pain involve infections, not... whatever's happening to you right now. Though that doesn't help you get anything off, does it? Hmm...

This is capsaicin, right? Please tell me you applied the topical first...

Anyway, erm, I'm checking and it seems water is ineffective. Vegetable oil is an option, but you need to avoid getting any in your inner ear.

[arrowpoint]

Well, it wasn't going to do me any good to swallow the stuff, so yeah, topical.

Somebody told me to use soap to wash it off, so I'm going to try that.

[goldenguitar]

your ears? [he is so sorry random dude.] why did you put chili extract on them in the first place?

[arrowpoint]

[Ignoring the ear question for now.]

Seriously has nobody else heard of this? It's good for sore muscles. Ugh, people rely too much on chemical shit I swear.

Video

[buildyourworld]

[ Pointy ears aside, at least you don't have purple hair and red eyes. Eugen reads through all the reply and shakes his head at all the advice given. ]

I guess it's too late to tell you not to use soap. Soap doesn't get rid of Capsaicin, they simply spread it thinner so it will still be stuck to your skin. Get yogurt or milk straight out of fridge and apply it directly to the affected area.

[ The good thing about growing up in farm, these are all basic home remedy he picks up from his Ma. ]

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[arrowpoint]

I'm sorry but milk or yogurt on my ears sounds gross. It's not happening. I already washed with soap and it sorta kinda helped, at least. I may regret it later but the hell with it, I'll deal.

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[moreweaponsthanyou]

Why in the world would you put chili pepper extract ANYWHERE on your body in the first place?

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[arrowpoint]

Look, I get it, it was a dumb move and you can all laugh ha ha. But for your information, it's a natural remedy for a lot of things, including for sore muscles, so it made sense at the time.

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[hollowleg]

milk, dude. capsacin is lipid soluble. it's why you drink milk and not water after you eat something super spicy. this is culinary chemistry 101.

as for the growing pains... i sympathize. try some normal ibuprofen

[arrowpoint]

I'm not stupid I just don't do animal products or chemicals, so that's not going to help me. I'm trying to few things so I think I've got this covered now.

You grow some ears too?

video

[youngestone]

[A Look]

Chili pepper? On your ears? Look, if you're turning into a cat or an Elf or an elephant or something I'm sorry but why not use something like aspirin instead of putting spicy shit on your head?

text

[arrowpoint]

I don't use any of that stuff. I stick to natural remedies whenever possible. Aspirin can do a number on your stomach, too. It can make you bleed internally.

[espigeonage]

Maybe someone's talking about you.

[arrowpoint]

Haha very funny.

[Voice]

[gobybessie]

An echo. Not much to do about it.

text

[arrowpoint]

Yeah I get that I was just trying to get the chili pepper extract off.

[bravelyspoken]

You're going to put bread on your ears?

Are you trying to make yourself into a sandwich

Also, big ears are nothing to be ashamed of! Own it!

[arrowpoint]

Dude, I was just going to try to wipe the hot stuff off with the bread, not strap bread slices to my head. And it's not that they're getting much bigger just more pointy, I guess.

[Text]

[ghostlyprotector]

[Oh, man, she's so sorry, Liam, but she cannot help laughing. She's holding her head in her hands and laughing so hard she's sure that kids at the other lunch tables are staring at her.]

omg dude. I'm not even going to start 'cause I got a feeling you've already gotten enough crap for that. I'd say milk, but if you don't have that, then maybe another base would work? I mean, I think spicy stuff is acidic, and milk is a base, so I'd ASSUME that might work.

text

[arrowpoint]

Can't do milk, but believe me I've just put more junk on my ears than I ever want to do again. I'm so done now.

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[occasus]

Wow, pointy ears?
Maybe you're turning into a bat.

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[arrowpoint]

Crap I hope not. Are other people turning into bats around here? Somebody was saying I could be an elf, since there are a few of them here.