Adventure 06 | Voice

[italktofish]

Hello, everyone! I've got a bit of, er, well, a situation, and I'd like a little advice.

Does anyone know of a place that might be able to do bathroom renovations for cheap? My tub's a bit on the small side for a guy of my size, and, well, if I'm going to be sleeping in there from now on, then I need something a bit more comfortable!

Comments

[voice]

[synonymouswithdookie]

Oh yeah? I'll be the judge of that. Lets see the butt.

[Video]

[italktofish]

Right here!

[And that right there is a shot of Arthur's butt in jeans--thank goodness--and it is the butt of a guy who needs to lose a little bit of weight.]

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

[ray makes a thoughtful little HMMMMMMMM noise]

Well, I wouldn't call it outrageous, but it sure is an ass.

[Video]

[italktofish]

When I was in my prime, it was the most outrageous ass there was!

It's STILL not bad!

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

This is the most outrageous conversation I think I've ever had.

I dunno, though. I think your ass has gone from outrageous to full blown badonk.

[Video]

[italktofish]

I dunno, I've had so many outrageous ones in my time, it's hard to pick a standout!

[Random conversations about his butt are just a thing that happen when you're Arthur.]

BADONKADONK, you say? I can't say I'm familiar with that term!

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

Somehow that doesn't surprise me.

It means you have a big ass.

[Video]

[italktofish]

BIG? REALLY?

[Turning around to look.]

Maybe it's just these jeans...THAT'S IT! I need NEW PANTS! A DECENT PAIR OF PANTS!

[No, Arthur, you need to echo back your superhero physique cut down on the fried food.]

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

Nnnnnno, that's not right at all. You need a diet, bro. Maybe a good exercise plan.

Unless you're happy with your butt. In which case, carry on.

[Video]

[italktofish]

Hey, I'll have you know I've gone vegetarian since I started being able to talk to sea creatures, AND I'm doing more swimming these days! It's already being taken care of!

[Milkshakes and french fries are totally vegetarian cuisine, he's just saying.]

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

You know going vegetarian isn't necessarily healthier for you, right?

...But if you can talk to animals and shit, I guess you wouldn't want to eat them, huh.

Swimming, though! Swimming is good.

[Video]

[italktofish]

Hey, it's gotta be better than getting a Whopper for lunch every day!

[The people at Burger King do wonder what happened to him...]

And that's right--I'd feel TERRIBLE knowing I was eating someone I'd talked to earlier!

Ah, swimming's OUTRAGEOUS! I should have started that long ago!

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

Suddenly that shitty McDonald's fish sandwich I had for lunch is making me sad.

[ah well]

I hear it's really good if you have bad joints. Maybe I should give it a go.

...As long as you're not at the pool.

[Video]

[italktofish]

Fish sandwich? Well, if it was from McDonald's, it may not have even been fish in the first place...

[He just strongly prefers Burger King, okay?]

Why wouldn't you want to come to the pool when I'm there! I'll have you know I'm an OUTRAGEOUS swimming partner!

Re: [Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

I just went from sad to kind of wanting to puke. Thanks.

[Burger King more like BLUUUGHHHGHRger King]

I think you just answered that question for me, dude.

[Video]

[italktofish]

Hey, it's not my fault they might be getting their meat from OTHER SOURCES!

I did? HOW?

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

I'm convinced their burgers aren't made of animals at all.

Your OUTRAGEOUSNESS might blow me right out of the water.

[Video]

[italktofish]

They certainly taste like they might be badly-seasoned imitation leather...

[Hmmm...HE SHOULD LOOK INTO THAT.]

But I practice POOL SAFETY and haven't cannonballed since that one time they threatened to kick me out!

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

No way, dude. That's too classy for them. It's more like cardboard.

...Okay, why did they threaten to kick you out for that?

[Video]

[italktofish]

...you DO have a point there.

Turns out they don't like it if you cannonball into those little pools that you're only supposed to lie around in!

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

Damn right I do.

Wait wait, you canonballed into a kiddy pool? Did you crush any kids?

[Video]

[italktofish]

No, it wasn't the KIDDY POOL! It was...you know, one of those small ones adults sit around and drink in? The little heated ones?

Well, I'd had a couple of those drinks, and one thing led to another...

[There's a chuckle. Good times, good times...]

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

A hot tub? With like the little water jets and shit?

See, this is why I'm mot going to go swimming with you.

[Video]

[italktofish]

SOMETHING like that, sort of...

It's okay! I'm not going to do THAT again! Don't want any more weird-looking bruises, anyway.

[Video]

[synonymouswithdookie]

What. Ass bruises?