yerawizarderi[At long last it's this hister tool's face again. It seems as though he might have gone missing entirely, gone like the wind and other such metaphors. What a blessing that would have been! Luckily for all of the numbered he's still around! How gracious of him.]
Well, I can rightly say I never expected to know what it was like to lose sense a' all of what's happenin' here. But it happened. Much to my chagrin.
[He almost looks awkward. He knows what he missed, and in a sense he's glad for it, but he also knows how that might reflect on him, and he's really not in the mood to deal with that. Augh.]
So...
[a beat]
I'm back, I know about the shit in bloody Las Vegas, I hope no one worth anythin' died takin' that thing down or whatewer. [Such sympathy!!!] Beyond that, what's been happenin' to the rest a you while I was away? Kinda got whisked off to the UK for a month or so. Family reasons, you know how it is.
[Yes good, he is so in the clear now.]
So, a bit outta the loop an' such, some briefin' on matters that ain't makin' the headlines would be appreciated, but anyone comin' at me with bullshit will be ignore outright. I'm sorta in a mood, an' not one that can entertain your worthless antagonizin'.
[There's only a select few who would waste his time doing that, and who will come regardless, but perhaps that will deter those who aren't complete assholes.]