( two ) text / video

[featherduster]

[ Given how much FBI and police blood, sweat, and (mostly) tears went into quelling the vermini outbreak in Locke City, similarly suspicious occurrences in Las Vegas are bound to inflame a few fears, even all the way in New Jersey.

It's how this YouTube video ends up sliding across the FBI's desks this Tuesday morning, not 12 hours after it was filmed and put up. It will probably be going viral shortly. ]

Two very important public service announcements this morning. The first, for those of you in Vegas, is this video.

CW: bunny violence.

[ The following is a shaky phone cam video of a blonde man in a top hat and a glittering, sequined tuxedo. He’s mid-patter, about to set up a card trick, when he suddenly starts to sneeze. He apologizes and tries to blow his nose, except his handkerchiefs keep turning into doves and flying away. Finally, with a look of dawning realization, he sweeps off his top hat (first tipping it to the audience, demonstrating that it’s empty) and theatrically reaches into it.

“Why, it’s as I suspected! You see, I’m terrrrrribly allergic to — AAAAAAAA!”

He yanks his hand out of the hat, hurling it to the ground. Something white flies out of it and attaches itself to the man’s throat, bowling him over. There’s blood everywhere, the man is still shrieking, and at this point the video gets too shaky to see clearly, one hopes because the particular audience member doing the filming is too horrified to continue, but actually it’s because he (along with the rest of the crowd) is laughing too hard. ]

I know the cops aren't exactly our favorites around here, but if you end up running into something you don't think you can handle, call the police. Or animal control or... I dunno, somebody with a net. Personal safety first, secure your own mask before helping others with theirs, etc. etc.

Second public service announcement: be kind to our fluffy animal friends, because they have feelings, too. And also teeth.

[ THAT ONE'S FOR YOU, ALEX I-DON'T-NEED-FLUFFY-DUCKS MERCURE. ]

Oh, and our good friend Mr. Mercure is mostly fine, before you ask. Turns out everything's more dramatic in Vegas.

Comments

[chernobolt]

I am sorry, but I do not know who Bambi is..?

[she didn't get to that one in her Disney movie binge, possibly for the best]

[squicksilver]

Where've you —

[ — been, he was going to say, but he knows the answer. On a farm in the Ukraine, killing large animals. ]

Never mind.

Perhaps you could come and find yourself a summer job acting as a bodyguard, protecting people from rodents. It certainly sounds like you're qualified.

[chernobolt]

I would be most pleased to help those who cannot protest themselves, especially if this monstrous infestations continues, but truthfully I do not know if such a thing is possible! I am supposed to return home for the summer.

[but she sounds doubtful, and it's pretty obvious to tell that these plans were made before the network stomped all over her life]

[squicksilver]

[ Silkily: ]

It sounds to me like you don't want to go.

[chernobolt]

It is not that I do not wish to return home! I am just worried that should I leave something terrible will happen and I will not be in the city to render aid.

[she sighs deeply]

We are all very skilled at the poor timing, you see.

[squicksilver]

[ Any sane person would use that as an excuse to leave town. ]

Well! Don't you worry! I'm sure everything will be all right here, at least. After all, there's only half a million permanent residents here, and a mere 40 million people who visit Vegas each year. I'm sure the handful of us Numbered here can handle any alien threat to the population.

[chernobolt]

[she sighs even more deeply now. some of that sarcasm has floated right over her head, because her response is perfectly genuine]

You have forgotten that there is also Locke City to still worry about in addition.

[squicksilver]

So you see! Lots of things to keep you in the States.

[ A little pause. More seriously: ]

Although it… probably is for the best if you go home. They say you forget everything, although that might not strictly be the case anymore.

[chernobolt]

I have not heard of anyone retaining their memories once crossing country borders, although I suppose that this could have changed recently. It is just that I am...afraid, of what I might bring with me.

[for all her excitement about the network and reincarnation, Kara knows that there's a high degree of danger still associated with it. she doesn't want to visit that down on her family's heads just because she's still a little homesick]

[squicksilver]

[ Taking her literally. For.... reasons. ]

What you might bring back...

Are you infested with something?

[chernobolt]

[her eyes widen in shock]

If I am then I am still unaware of it! I should hope that it is not true - I doubt they would allow me to return!

[squicksilver]

How would you know? If you were, er, infested with something, I mean.

[chernobolt]

There would be symptoms, yes? I do not believe that it is possible to be attacked in such a way without the assault showing in some manner.