Wheatley (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
epimethean) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
savetheearth2013-09-19 06:28 pm
epimethean) wrote in savetheearth2013-09-19 06:28 pm
Entry tags:
- !open,
- #network,
- ar tonelico: mir,
- attack on titan: eren yeager,
- avatar: the last airbender: toph beifong,
- baccano!: isaac and miria,
- danny phantom: danny fenton,
- eternal darkness: anthony,
- homestuck: aradia megido,
- homestuck: dirk strider,
- homestuck: john egbert,
- homestuck: roxy lalonde,
- homestuck: sollux captor,
- homestuck: vriska serket,
- my little pony: rarity,
- portal: glados,
- portal: wheatley,
- teen wolf: derek hale,
- the protomen: protoman,
- transformers g1: starscream,
- yu-gi-oh!: bakura ryou
001 [VIDEO]
[Hey, it's a THUMB.
No, wait, it's a ginger dude who has his thumb over the phone camera, but he seems to realize his mistake soon enough. He gets a little too up close and personal with the feed before pulling back, all terrible plaid and a disingenuous grin that looks like it froze on his face a little bit.]
Good news!
[He is also apparently very, very British.]
Did some preliminary diagnostics, ran a few tests. [Finger wiggles for emphasis!] Pretty sure that this is not, in fact, an incredibly sophisticated government surveillance mechanism.
I know, I know, that's what I thought too! But I'm probably...sixty to seventy percent certain we're all right on that front, which is good, because for a while there I was thinking this was textbook government. You know, set up some kind of...secret diary forum, or something, give us secret access codes to make us feel important, then mine all our secret diary posts for their secret...government...things.
Anyway, point is, I'd like to revoke my membership. And it's--it's nothing you lot did, don't worry, I'm sure you're all--you're all great! Lovely folks, super club you've got, sure of it, just...not entirely comfortable with the concept. I mean--ha, it's like, uh. With the numbers and the...it's not for me, sorry. Sort of weird!
Pretty smart, though. Wish I'd thought of it.
[Wheatley laughs abruptly, genuinely uncomfortable before it and the nervous grin dissolve entirely.]
Seriously, though, who are you people? Because if you--if you are the government, I'm definitely out of here. No offense.
No, wait, it's a ginger dude who has his thumb over the phone camera, but he seems to realize his mistake soon enough. He gets a little too up close and personal with the feed before pulling back, all terrible plaid and a disingenuous grin that looks like it froze on his face a little bit.]
Good news!
[He is also apparently very, very British.]
Did some preliminary diagnostics, ran a few tests. [Finger wiggles for emphasis!] Pretty sure that this is not, in fact, an incredibly sophisticated government surveillance mechanism.
I know, I know, that's what I thought too! But I'm probably...sixty to seventy percent certain we're all right on that front, which is good, because for a while there I was thinking this was textbook government. You know, set up some kind of...secret diary forum, or something, give us secret access codes to make us feel important, then mine all our secret diary posts for their secret...government...things.
Anyway, point is, I'd like to revoke my membership. And it's--it's nothing you lot did, don't worry, I'm sure you're all--you're all great! Lovely folks, super club you've got, sure of it, just...not entirely comfortable with the concept. I mean--ha, it's like, uh. With the numbers and the...it's not for me, sorry. Sort of weird!
Pretty smart, though. Wish I'd thought of it.
[Wheatley laughs abruptly, genuinely uncomfortable before it and the nervous grin dissolve entirely.]
Seriously, though, who are you people? Because if you--if you are the government, I'm definitely out of here. No offense.
no subject
...What?
You know, the government sends sleeper agents who think they're regular people, until their real memories come back.
Oh yeah! I liked that movie!
no subject
Right, so, not the government, at least where you two are concerned. Good to know!
no subject
Actually, I don't think I wanna think too much about that. From what we've seen so far, I think that could lead to an identity crisis or something.
Oh... good point!
So! No, we're not government!
But we own an antiques store!
A really nice antiques store!
no subject
1/2
We have that triangle-shaped door...
There was that one cat painting, where all the cats are dressed as people, walking around humans.
[They both visibly shiver, and add a quiet "glad we eventually sold that one."]
no subject
[They flip the feed around to show a giant... thing in the center of the room. It's hard to make out, but there's a definite pattern of gears, slides, and such. There's also a confused customer staring at them, but ignore that guy.
The camera flips back around.]
So yeah! That's the strangest one!
no subject
Does it work, though? What's it do?
no subject
We don't... actually. Know.
But it looks neat! And if anyone buys it, we'll make a killing!
no subject
no subject
Or ends.
Or if there's an on switch.
no subject
[I NEED TO SEE WHAT THIS THING DOES]
no subject
Repeatedly.
We don't even know if it's on the right side.
no subject
[A conundrum indeed!]
I could come take a look, if you like! I mean, I'm not--that's not really my specialty, but maybe having a second opinion might--might help.