five; text

[enrages]

hey, so the mine trip was a bust.
some chick hacked some emails and shit, and basically found some conversations that said the Sage of Earth of whatever was a total hoax, but that Thunder corp was specifically searching for something called "Target 1" underground.
considering how dumb it would be to just start digging tunnels and drilling everywhere, we assumed they'd be using the mines to search.

well, we were wrong. (big surprise)

i don't know if anyone ever really officially reported their findings or whatever.
basically, there were those weird blackfuzzy hairy things and it legit looked like they were on drugs.
that was about all we found, because everyone getting those weirdass pulses.
i sure do love when all our leads run dry!!!!!!!
^^^^sarcasm^^^^^



as for happy funtime karson updates, i finally passed out after staying awake for an entire goddamn month.
and completely hypothetically speaking and not linked to finally sleeping or any pulses i may or may not have had,
i have a question.
uh

does

anyone remember dying?
like, legit dying, you are dead and gone and there's no way you're coming back through magical superpowers and it's probably your fault that you died?


EDIT: according to people who can't be classified as legally insane because of lack of sleep, there was a buzzing sound in the mines.

Comments

text;

[enrages]

omg come on.
like just go look it up.
do it.
the titles will make you laugh so hard, i promise.
this is something you must discover on your own.

text;

[eras]

am i meant to report back with the titles

text;

[enrages]

yes.

text;

[eras]

in diana bones and the temple of poon
indian jones and the temple of spooge
indiana bones and the temple of poon
indieanal bones and the temple of poon
cindi, anna, joan & the nipples of doom
bikini jones and the temple of eros

okay mostly i am finding that the porn industry is really uncreative with names

text;

[enrages]

uncreative?
UNCREATIVE?!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
NIPPLES OF DOOM IS UNCREATIVE?
INDIEANAL BONES?!!?!!!? UNCREATIVE?!!!!?!!??!?!?!


NOT EVERYONE CAN BE A VAN GOGH, ARIA.

text;

[eras]

hahaha oh gosh
i'm not joking at all actually but now i'm kinda amused

text;

[enrages]

not everyone can be a van gogh.

text;

[eras]

have you got something van gogh worthy?

text;

[enrages]

look up lord of the rings porn parodies.
those are van gogh worthy.

text;

[eras]

i would wonder about your search history but this incognito thing probably means it is nothingness :p
okay okay i will do so
"lord of the g-strings" is my first hit

text;

[enrages]

see?
that's brilliant.
what kind of movie is it?
if the ring has been replaced with a g-string???
that's so clever.

text;

[eras]

i want to ask if you're joking around but i'm not going to
yes, karson
it is very clever

text;

[enrages]

one day, i will be that clever.
not today, but one day.

text;

[eras]

wait you want to go into the porno title industry?

text;

[enrages]

i want options in my potential career-oriented life.

text;

[eras]

what are your other options

text;

[enrages]

garbage man.

text;

[eras]

what about film critic

text;

[enrages]

there's a glut of film critics.

text;

[eras]

dog whisperer

text;

[enrages]

doge whisperer

text;

[eras]

see? wouldn't that be fun? :)

text;

[enrages]

i will keep that in my options.

text;

[eras]

good! the sky is the limit!

(or not if you choose astronaut lol)

text;

[enrages]

doge whisperers in space...