general clinic log

[testsonseashells]

Who: Drs. Solus or Strider, various patients.
What: Echo checkups
When: Whenever
Where: LSR clinic

The LSR clinic, despite its run-down, beat-up appearance, is actually fairly clean on the inside. Lit by white fluorescent lights, it's generally pretty empty, with the occasional non-network patient coming in to get something looked at. A volunteer is usually found running the front desk, organizing papers and responding to phone calls, while Dr. Solus and Dr. Strider take care of the actual medical business.

The waiting room is barebones compared to other clinics and medical practices - LSR doesn't have the money to get entertainments for the waiting patients, so all that's available are a few chairs.

When it's your turn for an appointment, whoever's at the desk will direct you down a hallway to the left, and you will meet one of the doctors.

[ooc: general clinic log! all checkups for crazy echoes can take place here. specify dr. solus or dr. strider in the subject line.]

Comments

[healspec]

[that response is dismissive and it makes him bristle, but he keeps it contained. it's displayed in nothing more than a deep breath, the slightest bit of tension in his shoulders, and his eyes turning to the wall behind Jacuzzi.]

[he doesn't normally get into personal stuff when dealing with patients. maybe a brief comment to establish some kind of connection, if he feels it would be helpful, but nothing too deep.]

[that is why he doesn't explain that he doesn't cry because he trained himself to react with anger instead, and that he only seems like he knows what he's doing because he's learned to fake it, and that he absolutely does not have his life together because he's 33 and hasn't even had a relationship last 6 months, and that he barely even graduated high school with his class, and that the only reason he's so stable now is because he's been on medication and in therapy since he was nineteen.]

[that is why, instead, he keeps his answer professional, and patient-focused. his eyes slide back to Jacuzzi's face.]

If it is a hallucination, many people share it. It is as good as real.

And if you can look at someone who shares your problems, and think that he has his life together, then let that give you hope for yourself.

[gunhearted]

[He doesn't mean it to be. He just doesn't imagine that anyone who seems totally calm on the outside can be such a mess on the inside. He's never been good at connecting with people--he's never had anyone to push him to do so.

He ducks his head again, almost sulking. He doesn't see how he could ever be as calm as Ravi looks. He doesn't want to dismiss something that direct, though, no matter how he feels about it.]

... Maybe. If I make we make it through the alien thing.

[healspec]

[there's a vindictive little ping of satisfaction at the almost-sulk, but he immediately feels disgusted with himself for it. he withdraws a bit, sinking slightly against the back of the chair, turning his eyes away again.]

Did you fill out a patient intake form at the front desk?

[totally avoiding the subject of the aliens. he can't bring himself to think about that right now. after his best friend was nearly murdered by the police not even two weeks ago, the last thing he's able to be about this situation is optimistic. and pessimism, however warranted or honest, is not what someone new to all this needs to hear.]

[gunhearted]

If they gave it to me, I filled out what I could. [He doesn't have all the information, but he said he could call back with the rest. Well. Stammered, not said.]

I'm not... really good at remembering all my stuff.

[healspec]

That's fine. [all he needs is a paper trail proving Jacuzzi was actually here, really.]

Let me start a file for you and get you that note, one moment. [he heads out to the front desk. he's only gone for a couple minutes, and returns with a folder and notepad of excuse note forms.]

[ofc he spent a minute looking over whatever medical history Jacuzzi had listed. justified curiosity!]

[he sits down and starts filling out the excuse form]

What days did you need to be excused for?

[gunhearted]

[His information just shows a history of severe anxiety, a list a mile long of anti-anxiety medications he can't take, and a unfortunate problem with asthma attacks.

He watches somewhat curiously, finally free of fast-talking and sniffles and shakes his head.]

Just the last week. I stopped going to classes on the 12th... and finals were through the 20th. [He does at least look appropriately ashamed of his absences.] But what am I gonna do about my face?

[healspec]

[damn son, a week and a half? it's doable but that's a hell of an excuse. He writes it down, signs it, tears it off and hands it over.]

[All it says is "patient needs to be excused from classes due to inpatient care at LSR clinic from 12/12/13 - 12/20/13"]

If they call to confirm, we can't tell them why. [flips through the folder briefly--did Jacuzzi sign the HIPAA statement? yes, there it is. did he read it? ...another question entirely.]

[looks back up] But if they ask you, pneumonia is a good answer.

Have you tried stage makeup?

[gunhearted]

It wears off. [He looks so defeated about this tattoo. It's huge and conspicuous and he's sure it's going to get him killed somehow.]

[healspec]

[slow exhale, his eyes drift away, considering. he has no idea what to tell him that might help, honestly. tattoo removal is a thing, but that can leave scarring behind. it's pretty involved and costly, too.]

[he wants to help, but he also doesn't want to give bad or harmful advice. and this...is not a subject he's well-equipped to tackle, unfortunately.]

[he really hates admitting he can't do something, because it feels like admitting to personal failure, but he reminds himself that not knowing something you have no reason to know is not failure.] It's not my area of expertise.

Maybe someone in costuming would be better to ask. [he does not sound as sure about that as he would like to, despite his best efforts]

[gunhearted]

I was talking to somebody--[Maybe this is going to sound stupid to a medical professional, but he might as well give it a shot. The guy sounded hopeful about things anyway.]

He's a cop, he said. He thought I might be able to make it look like an accident?

[healspec]

[hmmmm... a cop suggested it, huh?] Sergeant Kaburagi? [a guess, but a good one, he thinks. Kotetsu's not the only cop on the network, but he's the most vocal about being one.]

[but could you make that thing look like an accident...? maybe if you claimed skin grafts, but they usually aren't quite so distinctly shaped. there aren't a lot of accidents he can think of that would leave behind such colouration without accompanying scars.]

[after thinking about it for a good moment, he looks pretty dubious, but he smooths that off his face before he responds.] Something that will cause hyperpigmentation, maybe.

[pause. the dawning of a sudden idea. he starts off slowly and hesitantly as he presents it, but has picked up enough steam by the end to sound reasonably confident about it] Most people know very little about medicine. You could call it spontaneous hyperpigmentation and say it is a rare inverse of vitiligo and most people wouldn't question it.

[gunhearted]

[Jacuzzi watches him with a blank but mildly confused expression. He's sure that would make sense if he has any knowledge of the medical field. But then again he has absolutely none so that is flying right over his head.]

I don't understand any of that. [At least he's honest.]

[healspec]

[a knowing smile and a light shrug]

Exactly.

[gunhearted]

... You might have to write it down.

[He appreciates this so much. But he's gonna need to remember it.]

[healspec]

[CAN DO, BUDDY.] Ah--absolutely.

[let's see what does he have to write on? there is the pad of doctor's note forms but...he...probably should not use one of those. did anybody leave a notepad on the counter here...? no? damn. what about the pockets of his utility apron? ...nothing there either?]

[wow, uh. this is embarrassing. he probably should've just left to find something right away instead of making it REALLY OBVIOUS HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING.]

[bites his lip, eyes dart away, he gingerly sets everything in his lap (folder, notepad, pen) on the counter beside him.] Just--one moment. I'll be right back.

[scurries out...]

[IT'S OKAY YOU DIDN'T JUST COMPLETELY RUIN YOUR CREDIBILITY BY FAILING TO HAVE SOMETHING HANDY TO WRITE ON AND WASTING HALF A MINUTE SEARCHING. NORMAL PEOPLE GET THROUGH SITUATIONS LIKE THIS EVERY DAY WITHOUT FEELING LIKE IDIOTS. THE KID IS MORE CONCERNED WITH HIS OWN PROBLEMS THAN WITH JUDGING YOU FOR NOT BEING PERFECT.]

[...is what he's telling himself while he digs up a notepad and writes down what Jacuzzi needs to know. he mostly manages to talk himself out of feeling bad about it, or at least to ignore that he does.]

[he returns a couple minutes later (sorry to keep ditching you Jacuzzi), WITH THE NOTEPAD, and tears off the note to hand it to him. It includes the general bullshit explanation he gave, and also explains some of the terms it uses. spontaneous- sudden and without apparent cause; hyperpigmentation- when areas of skin are significantly darker than the person's natural skin tone; vitiligo- a condition that causes patches of skin to lose pigmentation]

['do you have any questions?' is what he should be asking, but he is still just a little out of sorts, and forgets.]

[gunhearted]

[Ahaha, this kid could kiss Ravi tbch. A few seconds alone lets it sink in that there's some kind of excuse he can give to most people, some kind of reason to look like a freak, some way for them not to judge him. He seems like something has been physically been lifted off his shoulders after this. Even if he can't take his finals, the worst part of it, he has an excuse for this whole tattoo thing.

Honestly the kid looks like he's going to cry. No, he fully is going to cry, his eyes welling up with tears, which he scrubs at with his sleeve and sniffles, covering his face as best as he can.]

T-thank you... so much... I was startin' to think I was really screwed.

[healspec]

[there's a flash of unease when Jacuzzi starts to cry again, but it subsides when he realizes it's relief this time and not distress. it's a distraction from his own anxiety, at least.]

[...it's probably bad to feel grateful for something like that.]

[NOPE not going down the 'terrible person' slope, not today. he gives Jacuzzi a kind smile.]

I am glad I could help.

Ah-- [smile gone, he just realized something important] Take it to the dean. Not your teachers. The excuse. [gestures toward the note]

[gunhearted]

[He rubs his eyes again and looks up.]

Why the dean?

[healspec]

Grades already are submitted. Probably it is too late for your teachers to change them. [notice how he avoided bringing up that point before now. he didn't want to give Jacuzzi YET ANOTHER thing to panic about.]

But the dean can excuse you for this and change your grades back to what you had going into the final.

[gunhearted]

... You really think he might?

I mean I know you said they might not, but! You think there's a chance?

[healspec]

I think there is a very good chance, yes.

And if they don't, tell them to call--Ah. [Jacuzzi doesn't have his number.]

[...JACUZZI DOESN'T EVEN HAVE HIS NAME. WOW HE IS BAD AT THIS.]

[eyes narrowed down at the notepad (frustration w/himself), he writes the number for his emergency cell, along with his name, Ravindra Savarna (with "Surya" in parentheses). Maybe Jacuzzi just...won't say anything about him forgetting introductions. GOOD ENOUGH, RIGHT?]

[he also throws in the contact number for the LSR clinic, just in case.]

[He tears off the sheet, hands it over.] Tell them to call me, or the clinic. We can argue for you.

[HE REALLY WOULD PREFER NOT TO. but his own anxieties won't help here so he keeps that to himself. advocating on behalf of a patient is a lot easier than doing it for himself, anyway...]

[gunhearted]

[Considering he is only here for somewhat professional reasons, he's not too upset over it. Especially considering Ravi already mentioned he was uncomfortable sharing names. Jacuzzi's honestly surprised he got his real name.]

Are you sure? I don't want to cause any more trouble... I know I'm already pushing it. Even asking for an excuse might not be fair. It was only because I was freaking out, not like I was actually sick, I mean it's just a tattoo, even if it's on my face, so it shouldn't have impacted what I was doing so I don't want to ask for more when I'm already getting too much.

[healspec]

Ah--no, listen--

[leaning forward, less professional, more personal] Anxiety is an illness. You did not miss school because you were 'freaking out.' You missed it because a chronic illness flared up. Because it is mental instead of physical does not make it less legitimate.

[these are all the things he has had to tell himself in the past to come to terms with his own anxiety. he knows how it is to beat yourself up over it, to minimize your worth, to focus on what should have happened at the expense of accepting the present. he's been there. he gets it.]

[but he has the experience now to know that those urges are also part of the anxiety, and that you need to rebuff them at every opportunity until you learn to stop listening to them.]

I am a nurse and I am providing you care. That is something everyone deserves.

And for me, in your case, care means doing as much as I can to help you out of this problem.

[gunhearted]

[Jacuzzi balls his fists on his knees and ducks his head, looking like he's been scolded more than anything. He's been told this before, by countless school counselors and a handful of teachers, too.

But his parents still expect him to function normally. So it kind of all just adds to the stress, which adds to his bad grades and sub-par involvement in extracurriculars which just adds more stress, which made his grades even worse and there went the idea of going to a university. But he's not going to blurt that out because he knows Ravi is just trying to help.

So he'll nod.]

I-I'll just. Try to ask him nicely or something.

[healspec]

[oh no, did he say the wrong thing? he can't tell if that's 'this is a lecture i didn't want' hunching or not.]

[his gaze lowers; he feels like he should say something more, but it's probably better not to push his luck. he needs to just let it go, leave it at that.]

Right.

[pause. he looks back up.] Is there anything else you needed, while you are here?