savetheearth | {004} Log: White Day [CLOSED]

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{004} Log: White Day [CLOSED]

Who: Misa Amane + Lazarus, Cesar, Emilia, and Stefan.
What: It's reverse-White Day! A chance to thank those who have helped her out so far.
Where: Various houses in Locke City and Las Vegas
When: March 14
Warnings: None expected

It was a little unorthodox to be giving chocolate instead of receiving it on White Day, but since no one else here seemed to have even heard of the holiday before, Misa figured that she could take some liberties. She really did feel bad for not using Valentine's Day as an opportunity to thank those who had taken her in and helped her out in this strange new city, even though she'd had a pretty decent excuse for laying low during that time. There was a lot that she owed the people here, and if nothing else White Day could function as a delayed Numbered appreciation day this year.

A small package of handmade chocolates in hand, Misa visited the homes of those she felt most indebted to one by one. She had prepared a little box for each of them; nothing fancy, just chocolate fudge squares dusted with cocoa. Maybe store bought would have sufficed, but Misa thought they all deserved a personal touch.

Some addresses were harder to come by than others, but one way or another Misa approached each door with a firm knock, and waited.

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He has a lot to say, and realizes it's not something he can just filibuster out, even if it's tempting to just get it over it. They're going to discuss this, after all, and hopefully reach some kind of understanding about who they were... not lecture one another.

"Kira is the name of the serial killer L was chasing," L explains. "And I know that he killed criminals with heart attacks, somehow, and that he didn't have to be present to do it. It was a tough case," he says, unnecessarily. "Like I said, my guess is that, since she was 'grateful' to him... maybe he killed someone she wanted dead. Someone who had wronged her, or those she loved."

He clears his throat before trying to go on.

"At that point, L offered Misa the chance to work with him on the case. She was enthusiastic about the possibility, saying that she wanted to support Light no matter what, so... it's pretty clear from that much that L's prime suspect was working alongside him on the case. Another reason for the handcuffs, must be, but Light didn't like the idea of her working on the case. I don't know who most of these people were, but L's exact words were 'I'm planning to have Aiber pose as Eraldo Coil again. He'll tell the Yotsuba members that while he was investigating L, he discovered that Misa Amane might know who he is. He'll also tell them that L brought her in for questioning on the suspicion that she was the Second Kira.' So... it sounds like he suspected Misa, too."

It's hard not to erupt into a flurry of new questions at the information that Kira kills people with heart attacks, but Misa keeps her mouth shut until Lazarus is done talking and tries to absorb everything he says. She doesn't want to believe much of it, but it does click into place and though she might not like it, she can envision it making sense.

"I have no idea how someone could kill healthy people with heart attacks, but... If the man who murdered my parents in that life looked like he was going to get away with it... maybe things happened differently then. Maybe there wasn't any justice, and he escaped. If that happened... and then someone came along and killed that man... I can see being grateful."

Her speech is slow and deliberate, as if every word is a confession she doesn't want to give. L must have been wrong, there's no way she was a killer herself, or whatever a 'Second Kira' is. But that would explain why her Other worshiped a murderer.

"We don't know that L was right. The last memory I got, when you kicked your doppelganger, it was of L and Light fighting while in those handcuffs. L admitted that he wanted Light to be Kira, he didn't just suspect it. Light punched him, he kicked. I was hiding behind a couch."

There are so many questions, and many of them are also on Lazarus' mind. It sounds strange and ridiculous to him to say some of what he's echoed back out loud, but he presses forward, nevertheless.

"Your guess is as good as mine," he mumbles. "And that... sounds viable, you know. It seems to fit, doesn't it?"

He's troubled by it, as if it is a confession, but it's not like he's never gone after people just for vengeance's sake. He doesn't have a leg to stand on in that regard.

"It's true, we don't know that L was right," he says, despite feeling, strongly, that it is the case. He can't help it; the feeling seems to run deeper than bone. "I don't remember a fight, so these must have taken place at different times," he surmises. "My guess is that they're different memories... clearly, L and Light didn't see eye to eye, and if one was a suspect and the other was a detective I can see why."

What a mess.

"There's more to my own memory. It was quite a lot of information," he says, an unspoken apology nevertheless coloring his tone. "He also said, again verbatim, 'If the Yotsuba group believes that Misa could be their lead to finding L, then they'll say that they want to interview you to discuss their advertising campaign. They'll use that opportunity to question her. Thanks to Matsuda's screwup, they may already be considering Misa as their new spokesperson, so this could work.' Light was strongly against it, saying that it was too dangerous, but you-- I mean, Misa, was just anxious to help him. She was even... happy? Flattered, that he was worried about her? It was very strange. You even said that you... wouldn't speak even if you were tortured, after Light said that they might try to get you to reveal the identity of the detective L."

"That's not so strange," Misa says, a small smile gracing her lips over how confused Lazarus seems. "I must have loved Light very much. To the point where I would do anything for him, and risk anything to help him. Of course I would be happy, seeing him care about me, and having the chance to be useful to him."

Though Misa knows next to nothing about who this Light Yagami was, she is obviously affected by the thought that her Other cared so much about him. A little envious maybe, that her Other had someone so important in her life. Of course a movie star would have a handsome boyfriend, but it seems that their relationship was anything but shallow.

"If we were trying to catch Kira, then we couldn't have been suspects right then, right? Maybe we were before, but it sounds like the 'Yotsuba group' were the ones being investigated."

L frowns. "It does seem that way," he agrees. "But I remember a few of the other cases L solved and they have a tendency to get complicated. Maybe he thought that Kira could be more than one person... in fact, I'd say that's a given, since he called Misa the 'Second Kira.'"

He pauses, thinking back again. Yes, there's more, and it seems to be exhausting him. They haven't even gotten to the torture yet (God help him), and he wants to sink into a deep and forgetful sleep.

"Light kept on arguing that Misa was in a lot of danger, and that if the Yotsuba group did manage to kill L, they'd have no use for her and kill her too. That seemed to sober her up pretty quickly, but then L said something about the handcuffs that you might find helpful." He doesn't sound particularly hopeful. "He said that as long as he and Light were handcuffed together, they shared the same fate. He said that if they died together, Misa would grieve the most of all, and said that they could either die together or catch Kira. After phrasing it that way, she was all about catching Kira. Then... well, honestly I think he flattered Misa purposefully, but maybe he meant it. He said that he was turning to her for help because her 'bravery and love for Light was boundless.' Then she... very dramatically lamented that she'd misunderstood him all along and even called him a pervert, so I can corroborate that part. That's when she kissed him, because I think she was happy that he'd acknowledged her love for her boyfriend so openly."

He sighs.

"If you're still thinking 'love triangle,' he did say that he could fall for her, but she pretty much friendzoned him on the spot."

"Sharing the same fate... how odd," Misa mutters, mulling it all over. Lazarus is quite obviously exhausted by all the new information he's received, but Misa's sympathy is limited with what she has echoed back herself. They have to press on regardless.

"He said that in front of her boyfriend? Wow. Your Other really was awkward," she says, eyebrows raised. It does not come as a great surprise that he was rejected. "It still seems like he has a weird fixation on them, between saying he'd watch them kiss and now this. But even if there was a love triangle and he was trying to edge in on their relationship, it seems like there's more to it than that. Besides, that Misa can't have thought he was all bad if she kissed him."

He shrugs helplessly, conveying to the best of his ability that he too finds it extremely strange. It seems like everyone in their Others' lives were completely crazy, them included.

"He did say it in front of her boyfriend," he confirms woodenly. "Either he was awkward or he was doing it to try to get some kind of rise out of him. Given some of the other things I've gotten back, I really wouldn't put it past him, unfortunately. She said that she wanted to be his friend, if that helps?" he offers. "Maybe she actually meant it, but... I can't be sure. That's where my memory of it ends."

"It sounds complicated. Oh, when my hair changed, I remember in that echo that I mentioned something about you being at school with Light... so that makes it even more complicated, huh?"

School buddies turned detective and prime suspect/also detective? Strange, strange relationships.

"Aside from all that, there's..." Misa trails off, busying herself talking a gulp of hot coco. She pulls the blanket a little tighter around herself. "Movie stars being kidnapped by stalkers... I guess it happens."

"School...? L was young, but I don't know about him being a student. It seemed like he had a very impressive career, and he was definitely older than Light by a few years at least..."

He pinches the bridge of his nose.

"Stalkers... right," he mumbles. "You were detained under the suspicion of being the second Kira. When you said... in my memory when you said that you wouldn't say anything even if you were tortured, L replied that he could attest to that. That would mean he was there... and I got another memory back that confirms it."

L was older? Maybe he was a teacher rather than a student, then. Whatever position he held at the school, it's possible that it was part of the investigation. Getting close to the prime suspect. Misa tries to push the issue from her mind; there's no use making guesses without more information.

Besides, now there's a far more pressing mystery to unravel.

Misa looks at Lazarus with a curiously blank expression, mind not quite connecting the dots. L was a detective. Even if her Other had been a suspect, there's no way that what she felt during that echo was legal. It has to be the work of some psychopathic pervert with a deranged obsession, not the police. Even she doesn't believe that the justice system is that corrupt.

"You're saying... You saw how I was. You're saying that it was the police who did that? And L was there?"

While there is a slight tremor to her voice, no other outward signs of distress express themselves just yet. Misa's tone is disbelieving— she's sure that what she is saying can't be right. The same man she called a pervert and gave a friendly kiss on the cheek tortured her?

"Yeah, I... guess I'm saying that."

He does his absolute best to keep his own voice steady. It's incredibly difficult, and he can't look directly at her.

"L was there, and L wasn't stopping it. Neither were the police. He was asking her questions about what she knew about Kira, and killing."

"He was in charge?"

She isn't sure what else to take from the fact that L was the one asking questions. They are talking about a man who proclaimed 'I am justice' on television; clearly a bold individual who could get away with many things. But torture? And the police went along with it?

Hands trembling, Misa leans down to set her hot chocolate on the ground before she spills it. It doesn't make sense. Maybe she is focusing on the wrong things, but it just doesn't make sense to her.

"Then why did I kiss you?" she asks, voice small. The question is less directed at Lazarus than her past-self. How could she have bickered playfully with the man who did that to her? How could she have forgiven torture over a single compliment? Why work with him?

"I don't know."

It's not an entire truth; Lazarus knows it's highly likely that his other was in charge, calling every shot and making every order that mattered at all. He watches her set down her hot chocolate, resisting the urge to reach for her hands and attempt to still that trembling.

"Your other was, from what I can tell, affectionate. Perhaps she didn't view a kiss on the cheek as particularly meaningful," he offers dully. "Some people hand those out as readily as hugs, and from what I can gather from my own Echo on the subject, she just wanted to be his friend, if... if that."

He's uncertain about the whole situation's authenticity. In so many ways, it looked like three actors playing out a scene in three different plays.

Misa clutches her blanket tighter around her body, wanting to disappear into it. It might make her look like a pouting toddler, but she doesn't care. She'll take her comfort where she can get it.

"I would never want to be friends with someone who tortured me," she says quietly. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere near him."

"Yeah, I... realize that. I feel the same way," Lazarus says quietly, shuddering as he recalls the pale face of the snake-woman who'd forced him to watch as she poured acid in one of Tony's eyes. The idea of being her friend is utterly horrific. The idea of even being civil isn't something he can wrap his mind around.

"I'd try to relate, but everyone who has ever tortured me is dead, as far as I know, so... I can only imagine."

Misa eyes him, curious but suspicious. That's quite the bombshell to drop.

"The way my Other acted doesn't make sense, unless she somehow didn't know he was the one behind it... maybe she was blindfolded the entire time."

The thought makes her shudder, clenching her hands against her arms and ducking her head. How long could a person be kept like that without losing their mind? Misa doesn't even know what all her Other went through, just a moment in her shoes was enough to terrify her but there could be so much more...

"Is... is that everything?"

She wants this to be over.

Just a bit of a bombshell.

"We don't know any of that for sure," he's quick to remind her, not wanting it to be true; he's trying to deceive himself just as much as anyone else even though he has a cold and leaden suspicion sitting in his stomach.

He knows that his other knew a lot about torture. More than any human with a soul should.

"I remember more about... Light Yagami?" The name feels so strange to say out loud. "He frustrated L. He was inconsistent. He seemed guilty one second and innocent the next and that's why they were fighting, that time."

The mention of Light gets her attention immediately. Misa glances back up at Lazarus, hungry for more knowledge. If there's one good thing that has come out of this it's learning more about her mystery man, but there's still so little that she knows. She hasn't even heard his voice yet.

"That explains why L said he wanted Light to be Kira... maybe he couldn't stand the idea of being wrong."

The more she learns of L the less she likes him, and she can't help feeling a flair of irritation at Lazarus defending him in any way. She understands it, the same way she feels compelled to believe the best about the other her, but all evidence is pointing to him being an awful human being.

"What does his voice sound like?"

"There's probably something to that," Lazarus mumbles, finding it depressingly consistent with what he knows of his detective. "He was very used to being right, and a lot of people took his word very much at face value, so... if I had to guess I'd say that he resented Light for making him look wrong and therefore... crazy? He staked his reputation on every case he took, so..."

He trails off, averting his eyes. It wouldn't be a stretch to believe that Lazarus' drive to be as altruistic and helpful as possible has manifested to counterbalance the guilt he feels for his actions in another life. He reaches down for the hot cocoa again, offering it to Misa, wondering if her hands are steady enough to hold it again.

"Careful and precise," he answers after some thought. "He didn't speak like one who didn't think first, even when he was angry. I think L hated that, but I think he also admired it. It felt complicated. Tangled up."

Misa lets go of the blanket around her shoulders to accept the hot chocolate, listening to his description with rapt attention. "He seemed that way... all put together."

She takes a sip from the mug, calming herself with thoughts of all the new memories she has of Light. More than just a face and a name now. Athletic, judging by that punch, though also a little hot headed. But she completely understands wanting to punch L, with the way be behaved in her echoes. It certainly doesn't prove any guilt on Light's part.

"I guess it makes sense for a movie star to be dating someone like that. She probably needed someone grounded in her life."

Edited 2015-04-14 22:16 (UTC)

The change in Misa isn't shockingly abrupt or intense, but it's a noticeable difference. She's hanging onto his words now in a way that women seldom do when Lazarus speaks, and he's aware and increasingly uncertain as he proceeds.

"All put together," he confirms, with a sinking feeling. How inconvenient for his detective, if the quarry was, in fact, well-organized. It's obvious from the memories which of them presented better; what, outside of L's reputation, made men obey his orders?

"If he was a suspect in an investigation like this one, perhaps not so grounded..." he says hesitantly. "I don't think that L was a terribly good man, but... he was blazingly intelligent, and I think that if he suspected Light he had a reason. If he didn't... well. I'm echoing back someone who's just as crazy as I am if not more so."

"You're not crazy," Misa murmurs. "Even really smart people are wrong sometimes. Maybe there's evidence we haven't seen yet, and you don't have to agree, but based in what we know... I believe in Light over L."

Of course she would be bias in favor of the man who has been in the back of her mind for more than a decade over the man who may have tortured her, but L just doesn't seem trustworthy. Maybe he is a genius detective, but that doesn't mean he can't be wrong, and after today Misa is inclined to question his humanity.

But not Lazarus's. It's not fair to project this onto him; if he really is echoing back into a monster, that has to be hard on him too. Misa feels suddenly determined to make sure he doesn't take her rejection of L as a rejection of himself.

"Come here," she says simply, patting a spot on the bed next to her again. No excuse of not noticing this time.

He looks like he doesn't even begin to believe that she doesn't think he's crazy, but he is too worn out today to argue the point with any kind of determination or effectiveness. He could always pull out the old I spent two whole years of my life in White Pines Psychiatric Hospital, but he doesn't think it would be particularly satisfying.

"Maybe you're right about the evidence, or... about Light," he allows, wanting to believe it despite the memories and feelings of a cold but brilliant detective existing in his mind and body.

He seems more than a little taken aback at her invitation to join her on the bed, but it's an invitation to peace. It must be, and he'd be an idiot to reject it given the current tone of their conversation. What would it say, I don't believe you and would rather not be near you right now?

He straightens and tucks a let under him as he lowers himself onto the twin-sized mattress, letting the other one dangle off the edge. Not knowing what to say after accepting the invitation, he opts to remain silent.

Misa closes her eyes and leans her head against his shoulder. Lazarus is not comfortable. He feels every bit as bony and unsubstantial as he looks, there is none of the solidity or comfort that she had hoped the gesture would bring. She fidgets, trying to find a better angle or some secret to making this feel nicer, but eventually gives up.

The facsimile of human contact is still better than nothing.

"The hair is kind of fun."

He stiffens further at the sudden weight of her blonde head on his bony, bony shoulder, but if he wants to withdraw, he doesn't say anything, just glances aside at her attempting to draw comfort from him like a sponge working a dry, cracked riverbed.

"The hair?"

He raises a hand to touch it, but not in a tender, gentle or even flirtatious way. He's peering at the roots, meticulously running his fingertips along her scalp as if looking for lice.

"This can't be natural. You'll probably have to keep bleaching it as it grows in."

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