[audio] one-man wooden box dirt party!!!

[grannyfucker]

[HEY LOOK, isn't that the number of that one douchebag who died a few weeks ago?? I hope you guys are ready for your daily dose of creepy audio posts, because this one starts with the sound of scratching on wood and some heavy breathing. Soon enough, though, the scratching becomes more erratic and the breathing heavier and louder--and then it's just full blown wheezing.]

Somebody...somebody get me the fuck out of here!

[Then a series of loud 'thud's as the voice becomes more frantic.]

Right now!

Comments

audio;

[hotshots]

[ Deadpan: ] Would ya... rather there not be anything to come back?

audio;

[grannyfucker]

I'd rather be above ground where I can move more than five inches in any direction!

audio;

[hotshots]

And we can make that happen as soon as we can figure out where the hell you are.

Ugh. Maybe if I made a few calls...

audio;

[grannyfucker]

Calls? To who? What?

audio;

[hotshots]

I'm working with the FBI. If you don't know where you're buried, they should, especially since I called them down when your body was found in the first place.

audio;

[grannyfucker]

Alright, alright, just--do whatever weird FBI shit you have to do to get me out of here.

audio;

[hotshots]

...y'know, I was going to say something along the lines of "hold please," but that's be fuckin' mean at this point.

We'll get you out, just... sit tight. [ A beat, and a groan. ] Yeah, okay, there's no way to point that which doesn't make me sound like an asshole in this case, I guess.

audio;

[grannyfucker]

You could've just skipped it, it's not like I could go anywhere even if I wanted to.