savetheearth | 1st ♒ text

[Needless to say, this is a little strange and he stares at his ipad for a good few moments before deciding to make a post on the network he's apparently just gained access to. Of course, not reading anything like the FAQ or whatever. He hardly has the patience for that. Pshh. Besides, why read that shit when people could inform him themselves? See? Much easier.]

alright so
here i am doin nothin but browsin tumblr at the local starbucks
rebloggin some shit enjoyin my cinnamon dolce cappuccino
when i saw some random ass post that reminded me of these bleedin numbers from for fuck ever ago
not even sure why it did considerin it had literally nothin to do with these fuckin numbers but whatever
so here i am again thinkin id fuck around and see if they DO anythin
low and fuckin behold what the shit is this
some sorta secret network i had no idea about with a one way ticket to it through some arbitrary as fuck numbers that i never was able to forget
im surprised to say the damn least of it
always kinda thought those numbers were utter poppycock at best just some stupid shit i remembered for no apparent reason other than to drive me mad
fancy that i was wrong that dont happen often

whatever enough fuckin babblin who the fuck are you people and what the fuck is this?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Nah, as long as you don't throw in bullshit spelling or numbers it won't mess up too much. You just made the reader sound ridiculous with the accent transcription.

Which is totally what you're doing. Try saying meaning, fucking, or something with a g on the end. I dare you.

[ this is why no one let her on the welcome wagon. THIS RIGHT HERE. ]

[There's a groan of annoyance.]

I can say those words just fine. I don't need to prove anythin' to you.

[A beat.]

Wait. Reader?

[ Because she only has so much patience for the "are you joking tho" that she sometimes gets, Sophie flips to video - hello, webcam she uses to call her grandparents - and waves her hand demonstratively in front of her face. ]

Yeah, yeah, reader.

[ Her eyes aren't tracking her hand at all, and are in fact not focused on anything. Wow. ]

Now back to the topic at hand. You're not saying them because you can't make yourself not leave off the g, huh?

[He stares at the video and--oh wow, she's blind. Welp.]

I see. Makes sense.

[Because really, what do you even say to that?]

What is your obsession with this? I can fuckING say it just fine, see?

[Of course he had to kinda strain there to say it properly, because he's just so used to leaving it off entirely.]

Do you get mocked for bein' blind a lot, so you gotta make jabs at people with a accent? Classy.

[ He earns a derisive snort. ]

I suppose you can say it then. And I usually stick to making jabs at people who make video posts to go "Wow! Look at this thing I have right here!"

[ Her voice goes high and mockingly cheerful for a second. ]

"It sure is a thing! What do you think of my thing that I will conveniently not describe or name because wow isn't it great?"

[ And then back to normal. ]

Trust me, when I start making actual jabs at you, you'd know it.

[ SHE'S JUST GIVING YOU A HARD TIME FROM HABIT, TBH. ]

Of course I can, it's an accent, not a flippin' speech impediment.

[PSHHH.]

Well in that case I'll be sure to litter the network with vague as fuck descriptions a various objects so that you will just have to seethe over not knowing what they are.

[Is he joking? He sounds serious enough, but then again Eri was never really good at sarcasm.]

I'd have to care about what you're posting first, dude.

[ What are they doing here, having a deadpan contest? ]

Anyway, I can ask Frozone or Birdboy or someone to tell me what's up if need be.

[ ..............................Yeah she gives her friends stupid nicknames mostly to annoy them. ]

Sophie. Who're you?

[Wow yeah what are those names even?]

They your seein' eye mutts or somethin'? [He lets out an amused sound at that, as if he was honestly amused with himself.]

Eri Ampora. So, Soph, how long you've been a part of this whole--thing?

Nah, they're friends. Don't need a seeing-eye dog.

[ She doesn't technically need her cane these days either, but she keeps it around anyway. ]

Around August. So I guess six months or so?

[ .............When did it get to be that long. She is way to used to crazy conspiracies, god. ]

S'not so bad. There's some decent company, and some of the stuff you get back is pretty cool. Well, as long as your "past life" or what the hell ever was cool, I guess.

[ Obviously hers was the coolest. ]

So then... do you make a sport out of trippin' over objects?

[Because blind people NEED someone to lead them, right? It isn't like they can just go walking on their own or anything. yep.]

So that's all true? This having to do with past lives and all of that rubbish?

[He's finding this so hard to believe, because really? This sounds like the plot of some shitty ass show that would be on NBC or something.]

Uh...no? I have a cane. I don't need it any longer, but that's what I grew up using.

[ She's just kind of baffled right now, to be honest. ]

And yeah, I guess. No real explanation for half of the stuff otherwise. Just wait until you get attacked by a moving snake statue or a cybernetic gangbanger.

Uh, speaking of, maybe don't go around the Blood Keys or the sewers or the Dead District in general? I guess.

[ SHOULD PROBABLY THROW OUT ACTUALLY USEFUL INFO AT SOME POINT IN THIS CONVERSATION... ]

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