savetheearth | 01. handwritten

[ The handwriting that appears on the network is thick, blocky and impeccably neat; almost typeface-like in its uniformity ]

All right, I'll be honest. I have no idea what I'm doing here. I've been reading this... network over the last couple days, but everything I've seen here sounds absolutely insane.

[ Several dots appear as Walter taps his mechanical pencil against the paper, struggling to articulate his feelings. How are you supposed to react to this kind of thing?? He starts again, erases, tries again, erases again... this cycle continues for another minute or so, until -- ]

If anyone can give me a quick rundown of what this all means that would be ideal. Additionally, if anyone wants a sword one kind of

appeared in my room

I really don't know what I'm supposed to do with it. If my parents find it they're going to have a lot of questions that I can't even begin to answer, so I think it's best if someone takes it off my hands. For now, at least.

[ A few more pencil dots, and then he feels obligated to finish this message with a small -- ]

Thank you.

-WP

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I knew you would see sense! You seem like a sensi8le kind of guy.
Sensible and embarrassingly str8-laced and devoid of anything even resembling a grasp on innuendo!
But don't sweat it, Wally, we will fix that last thing just like we fixed your name. I promise! It's going to be gr8. 8D

Since a firm grasp on innuendo isn't really necessary in fighting off an alien threat, I think I'll be passing on whatever lessons you're offering.

I don't know, I've heard wonders about what a firm grasp on things can do for a guy.

>8)
> 8)
>8)
> 8)

Okay, we're done here.

[ The notebook is getting slammed shut. Good job, Tavia, you've scandalized the new guy. ]

01. handwritten

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