savetheearth | video; via smartphone

Hah! Hah! Fuck all of you assholes with your stupid dumb fancypants power shit. Fuck you! Because I have a real superpower now. The best and most useful and cool and impressive one and you are all going to feel sorry for ever thinking my abilities were lame!

[ With a triumphant nyaaahh, Octavia sticks her tongue out at her phone and then turns it towards the TV. It's tuned in to one of those 24-hour live shopping channel broadcasts - a female presenter is currently hawking overpriced fake jewellery to the viewers. ]

"...And this beautiful piece can be yours for only three hundred dollars! But even if you wear this overpriced piece of shit, you won't be as hot as Octavia."

[ While uttering her slightly-suspect words, the presenter has an unsettlingly slack look to her limbs and a completely vacant expression. It's creepy as hell. After she's done speaking she claps her hands over her mouth in surprise, and Octavia turns the phone back towards her own grinning face. ]

Haha! See? I toooooooold youuuuuuuu! I can make anybody do anything I want any time I want to and it is going to be amazing.

[ She may be exaggerating just a teensy bit. (Permissions post is here!) ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

-I don't even know what I did!

Well I mean. I threat-- offered to help you and you got all Alan at me! Shouty Alan. Yelly Al. Old Bellowy Hunter. Loudshout McArtdork.

Yeah I got that part stop with the nicknames. I mean the. Smoking. Or whatever that was.

Shout at me again, Nerdling O' Screamer! Cutebutt Loudface. Foghornmouth Huntypants.

Uh. SHUT UP!

Is it working?

Uh. No. Maybe that wasn't it? Or maybe you're not loud and-slash-or shouty enough.

[ ... ]

Maybe I should get Karson to kiss you, see if that helps~

No. No. We're not doing any stupid as shit tests on this, okay.

What if it's too late? What if I already made him do it and he's on his way to your place right now? Is it making you feel panicked? Threatened? Shouty?

He- if you did it, he's not going to get into my house. I'll tell my mom he's on drugs or something.

Wwwwhat if I controlled your mom too? That would solve that problem for, uh. For sure.

[ POSSIBLY NOT 100% CONVINCING THERE as she knows from the whole scorpion thing that there would be bloodshed if she even thought about touching alan's mom

but

TESTING IS IMPORTANT GOTTA GET SHOUTY ]

Don't you fucking dare touch my mom.

[ oh no it's ~~hot~~ scary ]

Hey hey hey! You know I wouldn't really, okay. I was trying to make you shouty! As opposed to uh. Not shouty and just. Um.

[ Looking away k wow 2scary ]

Well, you shouldn't have brought up my mom. I don't want her getting involved with all the powers and shit, okay.

Okay okay. God. I'm actually sorry and stuff, okay. Like really voluntarily sorry for real!

Has she like. Noticed anything yet? Mine hasn't but she totally wouldn't, haha.

Yeah. Sorry for getting all serious about it, I'm just kind of touchy about family stuff.

She was kind of freaked out after the whole scorpion thing when I stayed up all night with the giggles and the yard was a mess, I think she was worried I was involved with some kind of gang shit or something. But I convinced her that it's all fine and I think she's fine when nothing else has happened.

So have you like. Thought up some cover stories for if things get super noticeable? Like if you get robot arms or new teeth or crazy powers? Because I have some ideas! We can brainstorm in advance! For example: how would you feel about your mom thinking you are on drugs?

[THE MOST HORRIFIED LOOK]

How the fuck do you think I'd feel about that? I'll. I'll think of something so that she won't have to worry.

SOME MOMS WOULD BE OKAY WITH THAT, ALAN. But fine! No drugs. Or alcohol or organised fighting syndicates.

I guess there are uh. More... momcceptable reasons for guys being out at odd hours and acting weird and maybe getting a new look at some point. Like I can maybe think of a couple.