savetheearth | Entry #B-3: "Beg" [Audio, Backdated to the 14th]

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Entry #B-3: "Beg" [Audio, Backdated to the 14th]

Regrettably, I'm late to this mess, but where my own double is concerned, it's my hope that I can be of some assistance regarding notable differences in manner and bearing we possess.

I have not personally met or viewed him, but it's my understanding that he dresses like a tourist, eats a lot of bacon, and hangs around Neuschwanstein propositioning passerby indiscriminately.

I really hope I don't need to explain why this makes him, obviously, very unlike me. If there's still some confusion for any reason, he's probably not been recently bashed in the head, so use evidence of that to check for the genuine article.

I am the real Lazarus Lawliet. Not every double is as cartoonishly opposite to the original as mine, so I've taken measures to protect myself for the time being. If you need to meet with me, we can probably work out a way for you to prove that you're not going to try to murder me. If that is your intention, stay the hell away.

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My dear Lazarus, do I sense a threat in your tone?

[He can't see it, but there's that menacing sneer in his tone again. This guy is absolutely unconcerned with what threat L may actually pose to him.

Of course, he's much more confident in his own ability than his counterpart, so there might be a little more going on there than anyone knew to start with.]

I don't know what you think you're sensing, but you're not permitted to call me your "dear". I'm afraid you've lost that privilege.

Such anger, all over a little knock to the skull. One would think you'd be accustomed to that by now--

[A small gasp, as if suddenly hit by an epiphany.]

My mistake, you let others take those for you.

[Low blow.]

I have brave friends. I'm aware of all of their sacrifices, as they're aware of mine.

I'll admit I'm not happy about it, but I actually feel a little sorry for you. It sounds like you were used by the clown who gave you... well it couldn't have been that much. He couldn't have had more than $1,000 which is embarrassingly low for even what you did to me. Surely you didn't take that little?

I don't need your pity.

[It's almost hissed, a flare of anger in his tone. How dare he insinuate such a thing.]

The amount doesn't concern you. I'm surprised it took so long for anyone to find you, what with the way they hover.

Funny, that.

[Don't you turn this on him he's not discussing himself with you.]

What, you... mean you took less than $1,000? Not too much less, I hope... he got away with a hell of a bargain, if so. If it was less than $800, he robbed you.

[There's some soft swearing off to the side.]

I will tear him apart.

[Oops he took less than $800. If you were trying to get your copy murdered, L, you might be well on the way to it.]

Edited 2015-03-03 03:20 (UTC)

[A little while later, Lazarus replies, attaching an address to a park and a photograph of a brown paper bag nestled between two branches of a tree.]

I don't usually do this for people who beat me up and stuff me in closets, but if you go to this park, there's a sandwich in that bag. I made it for you; it's really hard to see someone wearing my friend's face falling on such rough times and I want to help in any way I can. Let me know if you need more and I'll find ways to get them to you.

Edited 2015-03-03 03:24 (UTC)

What.

[So much suspicion in his tone... And after a few moments of thought...

Ex-EXCUSE YOU? He does not need charity how dare you. He is not some low-life deadbeat layabout like his other. He just... doesn't have the greatest concept of money.]

I don't need charity.

It's kosher pastrami. Really nice stuff, on a challah roll. I just bought the ingredients this morning, and it wasn't any trouble or anything. I don't eat much and I hate throwing away food.

...

[He is kind of hungry. A lot hungry, demon metabolisms are not to be taken lightly.

Fine. Fine but only if it isn't charity.]

...Very well. As long as you understand I am not accepting this out of charity.

Definitely. Of course. I put a bottle of juice and a couple of cookies in there, too.

[The suspicion remains, after all L did just threaten him and he doesn't take kindly to that.

Not that he can blame him but no one accused him of being logical.]

Why?

Because you might get thirsty, and something sweet after something savory is never a bad thing.

...Acceptable.

[He is going to eat that damned sandwich but don't think this buys you anything L. Hiss.]

OK, good. Let me know if you need or want anything else. I can't bring it to you, obviously, but I can leave it someplace you'll be able to find it.

[A non-committal noise before he cuts the feed. He won't promise anything, but you might get some kind of thanks for the information at some time. If the opportunity presents itself.]

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Entry #B-3: "Beg" [Audio, Backdated to the 14th]

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