savetheearth | voice;

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voice;

[ there's a minute or two of someone muttering in the worse gutter trash talking Japanese that anyone could ever gutter trash talk in Japanese, intermixed with some heavy nasty words in Chinese and all wrapped up in the kind of accent that makes his words even harder to understand. but at the end of it is a heavy sigh and then, Shou is speaking in English. ]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm staying in my pillow fort until this all blows over.

[ pillar of the community? wanting to protect people? sorry, he just wants to not deal with dopples at all. oops. ]

If anyone wants to join me, you're welcome so long as you know the secret magic word.

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I will.

[ and after a moment, he just sighs. ]

Password?

You never gave the password!

[Is that whining? That is certainly whining. Definitely whining of a more shrill and annoying nature than the real Hajime has ever managed.]

And come on, man, that looks super-fun.

I did too. I gave the password to Hajime.

[ nope, sorry, not letting people in without the secret magic word. he's got a gun too to make sure of it. ]

Then build your own. There's plenty places to do so. Like in the middle of the street.

No you didn't, otherwise I'd have it!

[Such whining. The real Hajime would punch the doppelganger for this.]

Come on, babe, you sure you can't let me in?

[...babe?]

Sorry, but I gave it to you so if you don't have it, I think that you go by the name Number 2.

[ and Shou waves his gun out of the flap of the fort's entrance. ]

I'm not Babe; he went swimming with Porky.

Nah, it's me, Hajime!

[Really, the real Hajime would be quite pleased if Shou shot this guy for him. As it stands, the doppelganger's getting nervous at that gun.]

Sweetlips, then?

[As if Shou needed yet another sign that this isn't the real Hajime...]

[With all the help from Shou, Tony's doing a lot better in not only controlling his speed and strength, but putting it to good use. That means he can make some pretty sweet time when he's being summoned to the rescue.

As such, it's not long after his last message with Shou that he arrives just in time to catch the not quite right Hajime calling Shou "sweetlips". Ew.]

You can't come up with something better than that?

[Drawled as he saunters up.]

It's almost like he's trying out lines from M*A*S*H, isn't it?

[ nope, he is not coming out of there yet, though the gun was still very much in evidence. ]

'Sides, my lips are better than just 'sweet'.

What do you mean, better than that? That was an amazing use of words!

[Poor doppelganger, thinking no one appreciates his brilliance.]

M*A*S*H? Aw, come on, I got better taste than that.

[And he still doesn't want to get shot up, so he's keeping his distance...for now.]

And how am I supposed to know how good they are if you don't show me?

[There is so much of a dramatic pout in the doppleganger's voice.]

Now that you mention it, yeah, I think you're right.

[Tony, confident that Shou won't ask him for the magic word again slips around wrong Hajime, still keeping a wary eye on him.]

No way, your lines are terrible. And you got me into some deep shit, dude. Hangovers suck.

[ Shou huffs and comes out of the pillow fort, before sort of draping himself over Tony. ]

You need the secret magic word to see them.

This really sucks.

[The doppelganger looks terribly disappointed that he is not included in this big drape-pile. He's sort of inching closer to the two of them.]

Hey, I may not have the secret magic word, but I got better lines!

[And he kind of puffs himself up and puts on his best smarmy grin.]

Do you have a map? 'Cause I keep getting lost in your eyes.

[He must be stopped.]

[Oh hi Shou. Tony blinks up at him mildly, this must be acceptance. He's a-okay with that.]

Oh come on, you got that one out of a cheap book of lame pick-up lines. What's next, 'did you fall from Heaven because you're an angel'?

[He uses the durpy voice and mocking hand gestures in emphasis for that pick-up line, too.

Don't let him in Shou this is clearly not the right Hajime.]

Some of these are a little worse than what I used when I was ten.

[ yup, staying right here draped over Tony and pointing his gun at Hajime-dopple. don't make him shoot it; he doesn't have a silencer for it yet. ]

I can't be an angel - I haven't found a halo yet.

[The doppelganger is starting to look kind of like a really annoying puppy who's been rolling in dead fish and has no idea why no one wants him around. He's also warily eyeing that gun.]

No, wait, I've got better ones!

[He snaps his fingers.]

Is that a gun in your hand--pants!--or are you happy to--no, wait, that is definitely a gun--uh--

Your dad must be a baker, because you have a nice set of buns!

[He's actually sweating now. Guns! So nerve-wracking!]

[Tony is quite content being draped on, he'd just like it better if the uninvited company would take the less than subtle hint, and get lost.]

[He can't help but snort a bit of a laugh at that last one, it kind of rolled into the so bad it's funny category.

Come on, man, take the hint. Get out of here.

[He'd kind of hate to see dumb Hajime shot, even if he is immortal.]

Sorry, but my buns were made solely by me working very hard with squats and twerking.

[ good because Shou wasn't moving from draping himself over Tony like a very expensive drape, his gun moving from targeting the chest to the head. ]

How much pain do you think a bullet in the head will cause?

[Nope, nope, noooooooope, the doppelganger isn't liking where this is going one bit.]

In the head? Really?

[He's taking a step back.]

[Tony frowns a bit, craning his neck to try to catch a glimpse of Shou's face, but gives up pretty quick because that would dislodge him, and he seems so comfy there.]

[He gestures at his own face.]

I can safely say from experience that it hurts like hell, you better listen to him, dude.

Shooting heads are fun too. [ he looks a little blood thirsty, enough so that his teeth are showing. ]

It's like shooting melons.

A melon?

[The doppelganger's voice gets really high-pitched, and he's starting to scoot away now.]

Yeah? Well? I'm just gonna go make my own blanket fort! And it'll be better! Then see if I let you in!

[You tell 'em, doppelganger.]

[Geeze, Shou, could you not say things like that? Aside from a faintly uncomfortable look, Tony doesn't comment on the melon thing. Though there is a bit of an awkward shift beneath Shou.]

That's the spirit. You have fun now, I'm sure we're gonna be real disappointed we didn't join in on your fort.

[Is he being convincing he can't tell.]

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voice;

[Audio] > [Action from the Doppelganger]

[Action forever]

[Action Heroes Dopple]

[Action Heroes Dopple]

[Action Heroes Dopple]

[Action Heroes Dopple]

[Action Heroes Threadjacker!]

[Action Heroes My Hero!]

[So many heroes!]

[So many heroes!]

[So many heroes!]

[Hero-tastic!]

[Hero-rrific! Not to be confused for horrific]

[Hero-rrific! My Hero the Opera! ]

[Hero-mazing! Legend of the Heroic Heroes! ]

[Hero-tacular! Return of the Hero! ]

[Hero-ing! The Return of the Return of Hero! ]

[Hero-rama! Son of the Return of the Return of the Hero!]

[He-radical! Heroic Adventures in Heroism!]

[He-nshin! Heroic Confusion of Heroes!]

[He-nshin! Heroic heroness of heroing heroes!]

[He-nshin! The Saga of The Heroing!]