Thought I heard them talking in their sleep yesterday [OPEN]

[dead_black_eyes]

Who: L, Tony, Belle and OPEN to anyone who might want to come visit them.
Where: One of Locke City's bigger hospitals.
When: August 18- 19
What: Two idiots get in a fight. Belle is a good listener for Tony and talks L out of a rash decision. Also a catch-all for visitors on the 19th.
Warnings: Profanity, violence, feels, two guys displaying some
symptoms of PTSD.




Sometimes, people could afford to be selective about the hospital they were admitted to. Specialized clinics and treatment programs, top ratings, and individual needs were all carefully considered during the best of times. Specifically, when one had the luxury of time.

This was not such an occasion. With one patient bleeding out in critical condition and the other in a dissociative, violent state of psychological shock, the only things that really mattered about the hospital were that they could be speedily admitted and that the facility had enough departments to reasonably accommodate both physical trauma and fractured mental states. The honor had fallen to Locke City's largest and most complete hospital, where Tony Sparado and Lazarus Lawliet had been sedated, separated, and taken to different wards on different floors.

This was two days ago. Now, some things had improved; Tony's condition had stabilized and they were both keeping down food. Other things remained uncertain; L, grimly committed to not answering the Mafia's questions during their captivity, was still not talking.

Regardless of what the future held, both young men would remember Albero's hospitality for a long, long time.

Comments

[dead_black_eyes]

The indignity of being fed was only eclipsed by the annoyance of it being used as a distraction from his real question. His eyes narrowed at the query about what he'd like, since food was not the most pressing topic at hand and it seemed like condescension to the frustrated detective.

Fortunately, Xander returned to it before L had the chance to bite one of his fingers.

"No, I don't think I will," he confirms, eyes boring into Xander.

[dominateartimus]

Even if Xander did get around to feeding and L still bit one of his fingers, he wouldn't hold it against the other man. It was his fault for mentioning it in the first place and trying to derail the conversation away from that topic.

"I figured that was the case." He says with an exhale. "It was something terrible and no one deserves to be put through it. That's why... I was rather reluctant to go back to it."

He hoped that his reasoning would convince L not to make him go back on that dark mind set again. But, if he didn't, L's mind would be coming up with ideas of his own and wouldn't meet his expectations for torture.

[dead_black_eyes]

L had done a lot of things in the last few days that others would, very kindly, not hold against him. Attacking his rescuers, scratching and biting like an animal, flailing at shadows and darkness and cursing nonexistent faces and voices... akin to a beloved blackout drinker on a particularly rough night, L would be gently pardoned for trauma and the ensuing insanity.

But the dark, burning determination in his eyes is on a different level, and Xander probably senses it.

"You're wrong. There are absolutely people who deserve it. I didn't think so before... and it might sound strange after what I went through, but I think I'm finally starting to understand my other that way. Even if a truth is unpleasant, sometimes it has to be brought to light. Such a truth is that there are people evil enough to go through what we went through, starting with the people who tied us to those chairs."

[dominateartimus]

Xander did see that look in the other man's eyes and he wasn't sure what to make of it as L spoke. A part of him wanted to agree with what was said, but it was wrong. They would be no better than the criminals if they resorted to such extremes. Yet, it was so tempting at the same time.

"...Has your 'other half' dealt with a situation like this before?" Even though the phrasing could imply his predicament in the hospital or when he was tortured.

It didn't take him long to realize that he was derailing the conversation again. He couldn't help it, he was curious and wanted to know that someone else had experienced the same thing as his other half.

[dead_black_eyes]

"My 'other half' was an interrogator," L said bluntly. "He dealt with a lot of situations, and in making my peace with what happened, and what might happen at another point. I need to know. What. Were you going. To say."

[dominateartimus]

It made sense on why L continued to pressure him about his thoughts. With a small sigh of defeat, he closes the container and shifts slightly in his seat.

"What I was going to say..." He starts to say with a bit of a frown. "Is that you could tie them up, make several incisions on their bodies, let them bleed for a while before removing their finger or toe nails or their teeth. If that doesn't work, you could remove a finger or toe or an ear or an eye. Or you could go for a low blow by removing their genitalia."

There. Are you happy now L? You got a glimpse in to his morbid thoughts that sometimes made him chuckle. He felt rather uncomfortable and sick for voicing them.

[dead_black_eyes]

L listens with the fixated attention only a desperate man can give.

"Barbaric," he comments after a moment, eyes focused forward. "Definitely not up to modern protocol."

A heavy silence, interrupted by what sounds almost like an afterthought.

"I think that's what I like about it."

[dominateartimus]

Xander only nods to the barbaric comment and refrained from asking what would classify as 'modern protocol'. Even though a part of him desperately wanted to know.

"...I don't." He says with a bit of an exhale before rubbing his face with his hands.

[dead_black_eyes]

"Don't you?" L challenged, voice as neutral as it could possibly be with a tangible and existing edge. "People who dislike such things seldom go into so much detail. My guess is that even if you don't like such things, your other did, very much. If you give in to it, I would be the last to judge," he offers, and maybe there's something like a plea implied therein.

[dominateartimus]

He nods again at the question, reconfirming his answer from before. A weak chuckle is heard when L comments on how easy it was for him to describe such horrific ideas. The other man wasn't too far off from the truth. Xander had only seen one memory where his other half took it upon himself to punish another angel, just to prove that he would keep his end of a deal and he enjoyed every moment of it.

"...I already have." He answers after lowering his hands from his mouth. "It has only happened a couple of times and usually in the presence of other members of the network."

Ravindra was the first one to see it when he took his time after disarming a Blood Key of a gun, using it against the thug. Eugen and several civilians saw him take enjoyment with destroying the inanimate objects that came to life. When him and a group of people went to investigate the catacombs beneath St. John's Episcopal Church and fought with the monsters that were there.

[dead_black_eyes]

Perhaps it's appropriate that there's some weakness in that laugh. L is vigilant for anything resembling vulnerability and second-guessing and uncertainty, and the fixated rigidness of his stare probably says as much very plainly.

"It doesn't sound like you don't like it," he points out, perhaps a touch unkindly. "It sounds like you consider it social taboo to confess to liking it. As long as you demonstrate remorse, or the appearance of remorse, others are going to forgive you, but... only to an extent, I'm sure."

[dominateartimus]

Thanks for making him feel even more uncomfortable, L. Even though he wasn't really looking at the other man any more. His attention was on his hands that were resting on top of the closed container.

Before he speaks, he takes a deep inhale and then releases it. "Yes, you would be right, but the 'pulses' I've received have changed my way of thinking. I'm not the person I used to be."

So far, he was lucky that people haven't deserted him after those sadistic displays. They had forgiven him after he had apologized for his actions, but like L said, they would eventually stop forgiving him and most likely start fearing him more.

[dead_black_eyes]

L's never been one to pull punches, and this latest incident was unfortunately a catalyst for making this even truer. At least Xander's admission that he's right seems to appease him, in some twisted way. The truth is unpleasant, but at least I'm right. I'm right, I'm RIGHT.

"Well... you're hardly the only one that's happened to."

[dominateartimus]

"I know. Other people are going through worse things than personality changes."

His attention shifts back to the container of baked goods in his hands before bringing it back in to view. It was a desperate attempt at changing the focus of their discussion.

"Now that is out of the way, what would you like?"

[dead_black_eyes]

"It's all subjective."

L, for instance, doesn't think there's really anything worse than sudden and unexplained personality changes. Considering they're the symptom of a few scary psychological disorders, it's not something he's comfortable experiencing, either personally or secondhand.

He eyes the container, sighing in resignation.

"A cookie. I don't care what kind."

[dominateartimus]

"Of course."

Xander would be in agreement if he knew L felt the same way about suddenly gaining different personality traits from the 'pulses'. He did consider seeking some form of therapy to help him cope, but it didn't really do him any good. Somehow, it was a lot worse than gaining a second form under his skin or new, foreign abilities.

At the request for a cookie, he retrieves one from the container and closes it. The cookie was a soft one with chocolate chips sprinkled through-out. He moves the container over to the nightstand before moving in close to offer it, since he recalled that L was still rather restrained.

"...I don't have to worry about you biting me now, do I?"

[dead_black_eyes]

"No," L says flatly, seeming offended by the suggestion. "But if you tease me about the fact that they saw fit to tie me down, I might absolutely feel like it."

He takes a small bite of the offered cookie, more to appease Xander than to satisfy a craving.

[dominateartimus]

"I'm sorry for asking." He apologizes sincerely before shaking his head at the other comment. "I wouldn't dare of doing that, L."

Once the other man takes a bite of the cookie and swallows it, he speaks again. "How was it?"

[dead_black_eyes]

L appears to recognize that he was maybe a bit harsh a moment ago. He's sensitive and much of the world is shifting and redefining itself and just starting to come back into focus and make sense again. He has to take it slowly, and be grateful to people who indulge him on that rough journey.

"It's very good. I can tell that you take your profession seriously," he says, as earnestly as he can when so much feels suppressed and numb.

[dominateartimus]

Xander doesn't blame L for his current behavior and can endure a fair bit harsh comments. He was in the army after all.

"Thank you." He says before asking, "Do you want another bite or are you fine?"

If the other man says he's not hungry, he'll have to find a napkin to wrap it up in before stashing it back in the container.

[dead_black_eyes]

"Fine..." he confirms, his physical and emotional exhaustion clear in his voice as he dismisses the offer of more cookies. "They're good, it's just... the drugs kill my appetite. I just want to sleep now."

[dominateartimus]

"I understand. I'll put this away and let you rest."

True to his word, Xander pulls away and locates a clean napkin to wrap the cookie up in before making space for it in the container. He tosses any crumbs in to the garbage and sets the closed container on the night stand and then moves towards the door.

"Good bye L."