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[odd_jobs]

[A video clicks onto the network. Tadashi flashes the screen a wide grin and then a peace sign.

He's been watching and commenting a little here and there, but time to finally really say hello. He brandishes what looks like a colorful, big buttoned remote control. He clears his voice and puts on his best infomercial voice.]

Today in Tadashi's Inventions, a made-up-right-now program, I have a solution for those of us who can't spring for a cell phone contract and the computer's being tied up by annoying little brothers.

THIS! One universal remote, though any old one in your couch cushions will do the job. Any surface that can catch and reflect infrared seems to manage it just fine. Like right now, I'm using the microwave door. Cool, huh? You don't have to all praise me at once, but you can if you want.

Lets talk practical AND convenient, this is now being broadcast while I nuke a potato! Advantages, delicious and timesaving, as well as the convenience and privacy of being at home. Disadvantages, if caught, talking to your microwave is ridiculously hard to explain.

So, hey, use it at your own risk.

Okay, opening chat! That'll be your mute button if you use it. [He levels the remote at the screen and presses a button.] How ya doing, world?

Comments

[reckless_fire]

[He sits down on the curb, wrapping his arms around his knees.]

Because who the fuck would think that some weird string of numbers would send you sliding straight down the rabbit hole, maybe? I mean, I got my numbers months ago, not too long after we moved here, and I didn't really think much about it. It was kinda like having some dumb song stuck in your head, or something.

[odd_jobs]

[He's quiet a long moment before lifting his hands to rub at his face. He'd had them since the lightshow.

Just didn't have the nerve to try them...]

Hey, on the bright side. Even if you'd wanted James t'hit you, you'd have had to practically guide his fist to your face to connect. Wouldnta been satisfying at all.

[reckless_fire]

[Okay, that gets a small laugh out of him. More serious stuff aside, that entire incident had been pretty damn funny.]

Yeah, he was pretty fucked up. Did he even remember any of that shit after he sobered up?

[odd_jobs]

Enough to swear terrible revenge on me. I'm looking forward to it.

[reckless_fire]

You like to live dangerously, huh?

[odd_jobs]

What, you couldn't tell? I'm already sure I've got a James Bond alter ego goin' on here.

[reckless_fire]

Yeah? You got a car that turn into a submarine, too?

[Strangely--or perhaps not so strangely, this line of bullshit is making him feel a bit better about things in general.]

[odd_jobs]

I've got a car!

The rest will come with time and loving attention to mechanical science.

[By the way Tadashi pushes away from the mailbox and the grand, quick gestures follow his words... he's finding his feet again as well.]

[reckless_fire]

What about hot chicks? Can't be a super spy without five or six of those hanging around, y'know.

[odd_jobs]

I'm not sure if that part happens after my impeccable, high class air of refinement kicks in, or I save up for a good suit.

Either way, that's a hell of a job perk, man.

[reckless_fire]

You mean you don't already have those? Man, I thought you had to have both before they'd even let you into the club!

1/2

[odd_jobs]

There's a second, a wonderful beautiful second. Where it's right there on his face, a MOMENT of considerable doubt.]

[odd_jobs]

[He just cracks up, nearly folding over.] I don't know what club you're talking bout.. but aint no way either of us are seeing the inside of it. I don't care how many freaky numbers we get.

[reckless_fire]

[Kenji tries to keep a straight face, but Tadashi's laughter is too infectious, and he breaks up as well.]

Dude, what the hell makes you think I'd even want to be in that club? Hell, they probably wouldn't even let me bring my board--and fuck if I'm wearing a suit for anybody!

[odd_jobs]

DUDE! Five hot babes all over you? I'd wear a.. a - I don't know, something off of Lady Gaga if it guaranteed a shot.

[reckless_fire]

[He ponders that for a moment. Hmm... Maybe? After giving the concept due consideration, he shakes his head.]

Nah, man, any girl that wants me to wear a suit ain't the girl for me. Quality over quantity, bro.

[Besides, he has serious doubts regarding his ability to handle five girls at once. He's not even sure he could handle one.]

[odd_jobs]

Okay, sure, if you already know your type, that's different. But what if one of them would the One? I'll make that sacrifice of pride.

[reckless_fire]

Hmm... [Again, he gives the matter every appearance of serious thought. After few moments, he laughs and shrugs.]

I dunno, man, I guess in that case, I'd have to see the suit before making the final call on that one.

[odd_jobs]

[He laughs and waves it off.]

And this is why I'm the super spy, here. Agent Tadashi, debonaire protector of Locke City.

[reckless_fire]

[He rolls his eyes, laughing a little]

Yeah, well you're welcome to it, Agent. I'd rather just cut class and hang out at the beach.

[odd_jobs]

[He makes a 'pfff' sound, leaning back against the mailbox, crossing one foot over the other.]

See, that's why you need someone like me around. I mean, even without all that freaky shit, we could be pretty good partners. I've got a good gut feeling on this one.

[reckless_fire]

[Whoa...talk about deja vu... Kenji's eyes widen, his mouth falling open in pure, stunned disbelief. It was the same damn conversation; the one he'd just remembered. The one that had never happened. But here it was again. Suddenly, his mouth feels as parched as Death Valley at high noon, and he has to swallow hard before any words would come--and even then he can only manage a strangled croak.]

That's...that's what you said before...

[And almost against his will, he continues] You were serious... You weren't just scamming me...

[Squeezing his eyes shut, he stubbornly shakes his head, every fiber of his being focused on willing this NOT to be happening. Mysterious numbers and a magical internet? Okay! Werewolves and mind-controlling statues? Fine! Invisible, wet dogs hanging around in his room? No problem! Even blowing shit up with his mind he could handle...sort of. But this? This is just one thing too many. When he finally looks back up at Tadashi, one corner of his mouth spasms into a pallid half-grin that doesn't quite reach his eyes.]

I...don't think you know what you're asking, man. I can't seem to shake the freaky shit--it just keeps dogging me, no matter what I do.

[odd_jobs]

[The connection doesn't quite click for a few seconds. While Kenji's face takes on the shades of some sick inner conflict, all Tadashi can do is sort through the confusion. He'd never said anything like that before... In fact, it wasn't until last weekend that he had even the slightest sense of it. And of course I am being s-

And then it happens. That other name Kenji called him. Kima-something?

That desolated city, desperate people flung between bullies and tyrants... He said that? That exactly? But why doesn't HE remember it?


Something settled in his stomach heavily, and it's some moments after Kenji's wry words that his expression folds down into something starkly serious.]

Tell me about it, then.

[reckless_fire]

Oh man, where do I even start? [Frowning slightly, he rakes a hand through his hair, trying to gather his thoughts into a slightly less incoherent mess. Finally, he takes a deep breath and begins.]

Well, the latest in the weird parade was seeing you on the network, I guess. I got this really intense memory of meeting you before, only you called yourself Kimishima then. Anyway, you offered me a job and said almost exactly the same thing--that you thought we'd be good partners. It...freaked me out a little--it was so close to what happened in the memory.

[The whole thing sounds even more surreal to him when he tries to explain. Still confused, he glances over at Tadashi.] You recognized me too, right? So...these memories I'm getting belong to that Kazu-whoever guy?

[odd_jobs]

Yeah. It i.. was Kazuma.

...

All I remember is going out on a job with you, and you bitching about the pay. Anyway, you pulled a move like you did on James, posture and everything, on some punk ... [His tone gets a little hesitant here, pitching upwards as he says the name.] Alter user? Anyways, I just pulled some guns and was backing you up like a badass.

Heh.

Man, you don't even know how freaky it was. Like, you're a dead ringer for him. Spooky sort of resemblance... when you moved here... well probably after, when I saw you at school. I had to ditch. I mean, I just bolted. How the hell do you even explain that shit?