everyone finds love in the end

[talkshitgetsis]

Who: Rei and Shinji
When: June 1st, probably. 
Where: Ikari HOUSEHOLD
What: Dead Boyfriend Talk 
Warnings: See above.

[She wipes each eye with one of her thumbs. Absolutely he cannot know that she was crying all alone in her room for the past day. Cold, unfeeling Rei who never cries. What right did she have to cry anyway? All she ever did was sabotage their relationship by being a passive aggressive grouse any time Shinji was happy. And now that happiness is gone. He deserved to be that happy always. She should never have been mad or jealous just because he was spending time with someone else. Crying over this was a truly selfish thing, and she certainly wouldn't want Shinji feeling bad about that, too.

She knocks at his door with trepidation, her knuckles rapping softly against the wood.]

Please let me come in, Shinji...

Comments

[neopianangst]

What do you want?

[It's not even annoyed...there's practically no emotion in his voice whatsoever.]

[talkshitgetsis]

[Funny that they're switched. Her voice is the one cracking with emotion.]

I want to be with my brother right now.

[neopianangst]

[He almost says "why," but he stops himself.]

Okay.

[He lets out a sigh.]

The door isn't locked.

[And when she opens it she'll find him laying pathetically on his side in bed.]

[talkshitgetsis]

[She opens the door just enough for her to sidle in, quietly shutting it behind her. She sits next to him on the bed, facing his back.]

Talk to me, Shinji...

[neopianangst]

[He doesn't even look up.]

There's nothing to talk about.

[talkshitgetsis]

It's unhealthy, you know.

[Lightly, she touches his back.]

You don't have to just be alone with your feelings.

[neopianangst]

Well, it's not like I've ever been healthy, anyway.

[talkshitgetsis]

Now would be a good time to start, you know.

I know how hurt you must be, and I can bear this with you...I can help...

At least, as much as a stilted, emotionless girl like me can.

[neopianangst]

Don't talk about yourself like that, Rei.

Sometimes I wish I could be as emotionless as you think you are.

[talkshitgetsis]

I've been called a zombie enough times to accept that there's some truth to it.

[She sighs, scooting forward so that she's next to him proper. She still doesn't make eye contact however, opting instead of stare down at her laced fingers with curtains of light blue hair obscuring her expression.]

With you though, I'm a little less like that. It's easier for me to express myself around you. Talking with you is one of the only ways that I feel like I'm able to really understand what I'm feeling.

Remember how we used to come into each other's beds at night when one of us was upset? Whether one of us wanted to talk or just needed to not be alone for a few hours. Even if I had nothing to say, I could always express myself with you. Even if I never knew what to say to you when you were hurt, at least I could be there with you.

[Her voice begins to tremble slightly, and she starts spacing out her words to collect herself so as not to let her emotions overwhelm her.]

But we stopped doing that. We stopped...being so close. And it was my fault. I got jealous and felt threatened. You started making new friends...You got a boyfriend...And I was still an embarrassment. I still--I never made any friends. We weren't the weird twins anymore. I was just the weird girl, all on her own. So I acted out, like a child.

And I...[She has to reach up to wipe her eyes with her wrist before it can show.]

I've been such a bad sister for the past year, so please, please let be here for you...Let me make up my failure to you, okay? L-Lets go back to how it was before, okay...? Let me help you...

[neopianangst]

[Shinji doesn't say anything at first. That's a lot to take in, and he's so emotionally exhausted right now that it's even harder to process than it would be usually.

Finally, after a moment he sits up, leaning against her.]

I don't know if there's much you can do...but that's not your fault. So...