o5 panic attacks | text

[gunhearted]

theres somebdoy here from my past
and not just anybdoy somebody i was really close to back then
really really close
shesin most of my memories
alost all fo them
but something terrible happened to her in the things i eremember
and its why i have thet attoo on my face
why he hsd it on his anyway
shes really nice and i dont want her to get hurt
if shes sees that tattoo what if she echoes aobut the other stuff

its really selfish to wish i cuold talk to her right
even though she could echo aful stuff back rihgt?
they coudl actually urt her.
really hurt her

idont know what to do

Comments

[healspec]

[okay jacuzzi bro slow the fuck down and type man, this shit isn't his first language, he isn't always great at sussing out typoes.]

Maybe it will be like me. You remember each other but have the wrong memories.

You don't have to worry about the same things you remember happening to her, then.

[gunhearted]

[typing is not his greatest skill.]

the wrong memroies?

i remember her killing guys for me
i remmeber her hurt after an accident and cryng
i rmember her in a buch of htings and shs always coveredin scars.

[healspec]

Maybe yours will be different from hers, I mean.

That is what happened for my and my ex-[BEST FUCKING FRIEND, UGH] roommate. We remembered each other, but in very different lives.

[gunhearted]

that caan happen?

[healspec]

It happened with me.

[gunhearted]

[He's a little disappointed... but then he feels guilty that he is.]

i really hope tahts how it is i dont want her to get in trouble.

[healspec]

[it's for the best anyway. he can use it as an excuse that they were never right for each other and feel a little less awful about the whole thing that way.]

I think if she is going to get in trouble, probably it will happen with or without you, and it is better to be there than not.

[gunhearted]

i can't do anything to help her anyway.

[... Jacuzzi of all the sentences to type clearly.]

[healspec]

Jacuzzi.

Do you want to see her? Yes or no.

[gunhearted]

[The debate on this is long. The answer is obvious: more than anything. But the anxiety, the fear of hurting her, the idea of that being more selfish than Jacuzzi wants to e makes it hard to say that without feeling like total crap.

But she was nice, and she was smart, and she was really responsible, and from what he'd ever seen of her, she had a great personality (it helped that she was really cute???). And, in their last life, they had been closer than Jacuzzi could ever fathom being with another person.]

Yes.

[And even though Jacuzzi wants to respond again to include all his doubts and explanations, this time, even though he has to literally sit on his hands, he does not.]

[healspec]

Then see her.

[gunhearted]

evenifit can physically hurt er?

[healspec]

[he could caveat. he could say it's not as likely as it seems, anything he might cause her to echo back she could also echo without him, he can't know anything, etc etc etc.]

[but that's all useless. it's getting lost in the details. it's not important.]

[the important part is that Jacuzzi wants to see her. that he wants something, and is trying to convince himself away from pursuing it. that's dangerous thinking, and it's exactly the thing people like them need to learn to overcome.]

[so the important part is not what might happen to this girl if Jacuzzi interacts with her. the important part is not letting Jacuzzi talk himself out of trying.]

Yes.

[gunhearted]

howm i gonnt apologize for beinga ajerk?

[healspec]

You say, "I am sorry for being a jerk."

It's not as hard as you think. Really.

[gunhearted]

you think shell listen?

[healspec]

If she doesn't, then at least you tried.