savetheearth | 03 | video, computer

[Emil is in his bedroom, a small cluttered space. There are band posters on the walls and an unholy chaos of stuff all around. The pile on the right still vaguely resembles a bed but the floor is long gone under all the clothes, sheet music, and what appears to be half of a hardware store.]

First order of business - any idea what this means?

[He takes off the baseball cap he’s wearing to reveal a short, white horn peeking through his blonde hair, sort of like a unicorn]

Got it after the light show. Not sure what’s up with that so I’m open to suggestions. I will also be taking hat advice ‘cause the baseball cap is not tall enough and it’s really uncomfortable. Past me had this - [He holds up a black pointy hat] but as cool as it looks it doesn’t really suit this day and age. [And he doesn’t feel like dressing up like his past self, anyway.]

Second, today one of these teleporting iPods showed up in the living room. Played a shitty song but that’s not the point. Point is that two seconds after it disappeared, I got hit with this Echo.

[He steps out of the picture for a moment to drag something back - a musical instrument, seemingly a perfectly normal ¾ double bass.]

And I mean I literally got hit, it fell right on my head and it fucking hurt.

[Holding the instrument upright, he picks up the bow and pulls it across the strings - hesitantly, as he clearly never tried to play one before. The sound is ridiculously high pitched for its size.]

Listen to that. It’s a violin. I know it’s a violin ‘cause it sounds like one and past-me called himself “the Ultra Big Special Violin player”. I have no idea if you play it like a violin or a double bass and anyway it doesn’t matter ‘cause I don’t know how to play either of those. If you guys know anything about giant magical violins then enlighten me. [He sets the instrument against the wall and sits back.]

Mom saw it, started to freak out about weird things showing up in our home. So I told her and my grandparents everything. Hiding stuff is one thing but I couldn’t lie to their face, you know? [Family. The only people who will never hear Emil’s bullshit.] I've been thinking about that ever since the giant snake thing, anyway, and today was the last push. They took it pretty well, all things considered.

[And by “pretty well” he means that by now they’ve stopped freaking out and no one’s crying anymore. He leans forward to turn off the feed, but stops to add one more thing:]

And yes I’m ignoring the obvious question of WHY THAT FUCK WOULD YOU EVEN BUILD A VIOLIN THIS BIG YOU FUCKING WEIRDO ‘cause it’s easier on my brain.

[Emil out.]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Good news! There's a girl unicorn on the network so you won't be lonely. Also I have no idea HOW something that big can sound like a violin, but I do know a few things about playing a normal one.

I'm not a freaking unicorn, past me looked normal other than that.

[He hopes. His past self also wore a long flowy cape, excellent for hiding extra appendages. But he did look baseline human.]

Violin tips, though, that'd be useful.

You could make it suit this day and age. Start a trend.

Ha! Maybe I can.

[He puts the pointy hat on. Grabs the brim and twists to the left. Then to the right. Eventually he fixes it to sit jauntily on his head and straightnes the feather. It's super stylish really.]

But it's kinda weird. Dressing up like him.

Important checklist before you start: 1) Actual violin with four (4) strings 2) Bow 3) Carrying case (don't just lug it around it's a precision instrument) 4) Shoulder rest 5) Chin guard 5) Rosin (kind of like lube for your bow. Not that kind of lube.)

Pfff -

[First, point 5 gets a laugh. He's not very mature okay.]

[And now that's out of the way...]

Uh actual violins are kinda expensive. And I know it's gonna sound super weird but I think this one like me.

Edited (formatting! sorry i'll stop attacking your inbox) 2014-04-03 22:15 (UTC)

Well if it sounds like a violin I guess you can play it as a violin, I just have no idea how you'd hold it. Or play it properly if you just set it like a bass.

Can you still use violin - [Hold on, what's the word...] fingering if you hold it likes a bass?

Never tried it and not going to, but the worst thing that could happen is you'd strain your wrist. I'd be more worried about the bow motion.

So that's different too...

[He holds the bow, twirls it in his hands.]

Why's that a bigger problem than the fingers?

Violin bowing is a lot faster and jerkier than bass or cello bowing. Playing violin on something upright is likely to make you elbow yourself in the stomach every time you play something uptempo.

[He looks at the violin. Makes a face]

Then what the hell am I supposed to do with this thing?

[He gets up and grabs the violin, holding it upright. Makes a face again and mumbles something mostly unintelligible though the word "stupid" is definitely there.

Then, he hoists the instrument over his right shoulder - even with super strength, he isn’t used to it so he wobbles a little - and tries to hold it like you hold a violin. It’s not a delicate grasp and the lower bout just sticks out behind his shoulder because yeah, no way he can put it under his chin.]

Okay, you’re the violin expert between the two of us - how dumb do I look right now?

how well is pretty well?

Their kid grew a horn and the worst thing they had to say was why didn't you say something earlier.

[Well now she certainly sees a sight.

A pulse comes up over her, and... A white horn, yellow hair, not the most pleasant of attitudes.

With a smidge of sugarcoated benign distaste.]

...No offense, darling, but, I~ do think you're bound to make for a better... [Considering roll-of-her-eyes, quicker rotating of her hoof the way someone'd rotate their wrist.] ...whatever your past self is than a unicorn.

[That said after peeking at the conversation with Asuka.]

[He huffs. Why does every single animal he sees on the networks ends up talking down to him?! (answer: because of that attitude.)]

Don’t say whatever, it sounds bad! [Stingy. The thought of turning into something else bothers him.] And yeah I shouldn’t be a unicorn ‘casue you need opposable thumbs to play a violin.

Oh, says you.

[Upward flick of her head, waggling of her ears - and a smirk in her tone, though not a nasty one. Brings it up rarified.] I'm sure with a little practice a unicorn could become a violinist! Assuming we can all do this. [A hat floats itself up off a hook on the side of the mirror she's using, glowing blue. It drops onto and angles on her head.] After all, I have learned to write.

...Not that you're a unicorn, of course - just as you've said!

Show off. [grumble grumble]

Maybe you can learn to move the bow, but what would you do with the fingering, use a robotic hand?

[A beat.]

That sounds kinda cool actually.

[ That looks ridiculous. But he's not laughing, no. ]

A woolen cap might work, otherwise. If it's loose.

Mmm-hm, I guess that's an option.

[He pokes the horn a little and sighs.]

What am I even thinking about. Why is everything about him weird and/or stupid.

and they aren't like you??

What? With a horn or on numbered? That's no to both.

[ C h u c k l e. ]

I don't know, kid. Maybe someone's just messing with you.

[moment of visceral DON'T SHOW PEOPLE THAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING]

[but if he says something he'll let on that he knows what's up and he does not want to do that, so he'll just...restrain himself...]

how did your parents take it?

[because his...had some issues with it, to be honest...]

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