Calvin Kent | Clark Kent (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
idealofhope) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
savetheearth2014-01-28 06:40 pm
idealofhope) wrote in savetheearth2014-01-28 06:40 pm
video - computer
[Recording from outside his home, apparently in his own backyard on a patio, Calvin looks mildly perturbed as he tosses a baseball from hand to hand. He runs a free hand through his beard and starts speaking:] Okay, couple things. First off.
Next person who decides to fake-die on me without warning me first, I'm kicking their ass. This includes getting all weird and sparkly and then getting back up or just garden variety pretending you're dead, when really, you're not. If you do either of those things or some heretofore undiscovered way to mess with my head and make me think you just died, I'm gonna be super P.O.ed. Okay? We all understand each other? Cool. Okay. [He nods and tries to affect a less annoyed demeanor.] On to other stuff.
I know the place we went for that meeting got the crap beat out of it, so if we need another meeting or somebody just needs a place to crash to deal with whatever Numbers related stuff, my place is up for it. Somebody went outta there way to open their home and got it wrecked for their trouble, so I'm pretty sure that means I should pay it forward, right? Right.
And, uhhh. [He tosses the ball up in his hand a couple more times. He grabs something from offscreen. It turns out to be a bat.] One more thing, but...I should probably just show this instead of talking about it.
[He turns away from his computer, steps off of his patio and towards his (spacious) backyard. He throws the baseball into the air and then with a motion that looks well-practiced, he flicks the ball with the bat. The ball goes high and deep into the air as the bat slips out of his hands. Calvin waits for a few seconds, grabs a glove, slips it on his hand and starts running after the ball.
Then, he suddenly accelerates, turning into a blur and crossing a couple hundred feet in the space of a couple seconds. When he stops, he's got more than enough time to hold his glove up and wait for the ball fall into it. When he comes back to the computer, he doesn't run again - he just jogs. When he gets back, he shows the ball in his glove. No sleight of hand - he hit the ball, ran it down at supersonic speed and caught it.]
Y'think this counts as a PED? 'Cause I might have some problems when Spring rolls around if it does.
Next person who decides to fake-die on me without warning me first, I'm kicking their ass. This includes getting all weird and sparkly and then getting back up or just garden variety pretending you're dead, when really, you're not. If you do either of those things or some heretofore undiscovered way to mess with my head and make me think you just died, I'm gonna be super P.O.ed. Okay? We all understand each other? Cool. Okay. [He nods and tries to affect a less annoyed demeanor.] On to other stuff.
I know the place we went for that meeting got the crap beat out of it, so if we need another meeting or somebody just needs a place to crash to deal with whatever Numbers related stuff, my place is up for it. Somebody went outta there way to open their home and got it wrecked for their trouble, so I'm pretty sure that means I should pay it forward, right? Right.
And, uhhh. [He tosses the ball up in his hand a couple more times. He grabs something from offscreen. It turns out to be a bat.] One more thing, but...I should probably just show this instead of talking about it.
[He turns away from his computer, steps off of his patio and towards his (spacious) backyard. He throws the baseball into the air and then with a motion that looks well-practiced, he flicks the ball with the bat. The ball goes high and deep into the air as the bat slips out of his hands. Calvin waits for a few seconds, grabs a glove, slips it on his hand and starts running after the ball.
Then, he suddenly accelerates, turning into a blur and crossing a couple hundred feet in the space of a couple seconds. When he stops, he's got more than enough time to hold his glove up and wait for the ball fall into it. When he comes back to the computer, he doesn't run again - he just jogs. When he gets back, he shows the ball in his glove. No sleight of hand - he hit the ball, ran it down at supersonic speed and caught it.]
Y'think this counts as a PED? 'Cause I might have some problems when Spring rolls around if it does.
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I didn't say I thought it was fun!
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Well
How DID you walk out of it anyway I'm still pretty foggy on that.
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i got regenrated byu rainbow fire or some shit i wasnt conscious until after
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Magic.
Although someone else said she could do it too so it's consistent magic at least, I guess?
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yeah i guess
who even fuckin knos anymore dude
[Video]
[Video]
[...]
Did you know you could take a bullet to the back before we went down there?
[Video]
I mean, really, I didn't think you could move that fast! TALK ABOUT OUTRAGEOUS!
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I didn't exactly know I could do that either. I think them shooting at me caused me to get an echo.
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[Super strength. It's a blessing and a curse.]
[Video]
...
Wait, breaking things?
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Funny thing, how this turned out--after Granny got mugged, SHE got OUTRAGEOUSLY STRONG! And then I turned around and did the SAME THING!
It is HARD to get used to having OUTRAGEOUS SUPER STRENGTH! We're spending a bundle on furniture!
[Video]
Yeah, I can see how that'd be tough, I've kinda. Had some trouble not throwing myself all over my house when I need to run up the stairs or something.
...
Wait a sec, your grandma has super strength too?
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[He nods.]
It's OUTRAGEOUS! Granny got the super strength before I did--she says it's because she's a magical girl!
[Video]
A whatnow?
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Superhero ballroom dancers?
And there's more than one of those?
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I guess that's a feather in her cap.
So....do you know what that makes you? Are you like, a magical... [boy sounds too weird.] man?
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Good grief, man, I'm a SUPERHERO! That's the right word for it--and you must be one, too, with the way you were moving back there!
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Uh, I dunno if that's what I count as, though.
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...I dunno. I'm starting to get the feeling the guy I used to be wasn't so good.
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What sort of things have you been remembering, chum?
[Video]
When those punks shot at me, I remembered being shot at by something else.
I think it was a government jet.
[Video]
[There's a pause, and then...]
DO YOU THINK YOU'VE DONE THIS BEFORE?!
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The sparkledying thing. Not the crazy speed 8ullshit thing you just did.
8ut yeah. If they ever kill me too I'm coming 8ack the same way! In case that is ever relevant.
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I got shot 8y 8lood Keys a while ago. And then the other time I fell over and cracked my head open on the tu8.
No snakedeaths! Yet. 8r EV8R n8w, I gu8ss!
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I admit I wasn't exactly chomping at the bit to go running after them after they left.
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But if somebody else is willing to offer their place up and if it'd help, I should be willing to do the same thing.
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i think i know a place.
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...what kinda magic stuff?
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i do fire and water, mostly.
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I tripped and smacked into the ground at super high speed like a jackass too when I first found out I could do it, but that wound up on the cutting room floor.
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Any time I've tried to get fancier than that has wound up in a face plant.
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Really.
Really does.
Word of advice, if you're ever gonna wipe out at super speed? Do it in the snow. I think I'd be leaving little chunks of me behind if I did this on the pavement.
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[Avoiding the issue? Absolutely.]
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'Course not, they'll be too busy trying to take me down like Arod for that.
[He tosses the ball up in his hand for a couple seconds, before holding it up.]
Hey, y'want this? I could sign it or something.
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