two sick, disgusting thoughts | text

[somesayinfire]

Damn it. Ever since I ran into that scorpion (I have a picture of it, if anyone's interested), I've been feeling... weird. That's the best way to put it. It's stupid and I can't shake it, because I know I wasn't always like this. But it's like... I woke up earlier in the week and I wasn't even sure if I could go into work today. If I could do my job. The one I've been doing for three years.

I have a feeling it's one of those... are we calling them echoes? Or lurches? One of those things. And so far it's been so strong that I've basically been fighting it back down just to get myself to do regular things. Hell, it took me two days to work up the nerve to make this post.

Sorry, I know I shouldn't be using this network as a blog. Like I said, I have a hand-drawn picture of the scorpion that attacked us (courtesy of Alan). To the person I said I'd give it to, I just did, so be sure to check that.

Oh, if anybody had one of these echo things that left them hungry for bodily fluids afterwards, which is easily the weirdest sentence I've ever typed, let me know and I'll see if I can do something about it. Same goes if you're looking for some kind of cosmetic touch-up. I'm a pretty skilled makeup artist when this lousy space depression thing isn't holding me back.

[the picture she keeps mentioning isn't attached to the post, but she has it on hand if anyone's curious.]

Comments

[also text!]

[wordsgate]

Hm. So you've got one of those 'extras' and you've been feeling depressed since then?

[somesayinfire]

Yeah. And trust me, if it were depression because of something happening in my life, I would know. Except for the secret numbers club and running away from a giant scorpion, my life is pretty okay right now. That's why I can't explain it.

[wordsgate]

Well...depression isn't always caused by life events, although that's a common factor. It can also be caused by chemical imbalances in the brain.

But if it was caused by an extra I guess it doesn't have to be that, either. I've gotten weird floods of emotion from some of my extras, too.

text;

[thorny]

Preternatural occurrences are a poor excuse for nonexistent work ethic. I'd say it's a little late in your life to make a stab at creativity, don't you?

[somesayinfire]

Oh boy, you're still here. If this were a problem with my work ethic, I would have figured it out two years and eleven months ago.

[thorny]

Most people would, but I believe that we've established by now that you're something of a special case.

[Text | Handwritten]

[scramasax]

She is very good. [He'll supply passing testimonial on her mention of cosmetic skills.

He hopes that both that and this will do something even as a gesture for anything describable as "space depression" - what can one say to help treatment of a feeling like that of all things supernaturally-induced all on its own...?]

This is Anthony... I wanted to thank you again!

[somesayinfire]

I'd recognize your handwriting anywhere, Anthony! [she knows what he's doing, and hoo boy does she appreciate it.] Thanks for the testimonial. It means a lot to me that you're satisfied with how it worked out. :)

[scramasax]

[And in turn he'll take from the tone of that response that it isn't unwelcome!]

It worked out much better than I expected would be possible. It has to mean a lot to my parents, too.

You were still very generous to help. [He meanwhile wonders quite specifically on the "hungry for bodily fluids" bit - Alex? - but there are multiple reasons it would be terribly inappropriate to ask - he'll try a bit of a joke. His lips tighten in an awkward, uncertainly hopeful, wry smile on his end as he writes the line.] ... It is especially because you must not have expected this in working with dead people.

[The "this" is a bit of a general "this".]

[Text, handwritten]

[darkhourdear]

Are you ok? Was it a really creepy scorpion or something?

[somesayinfire]

Hey, Phillip. :) It was pretty scary, I won't lie. It was also enormous, way bigger than a scorpion has any right to be. I can show you the picture if you want.

[darkhourdear]

Ok! But you're ok right?

text;

[hollowleg]

bodily fluids what.

and sorry to hear that one of the SFBs is causing you some nasty feelings. my latest one did, too, but at least i know WHY

[somesayinfire]

Hey, sometimes people need services that only somebody who works with the dead can provide. It's not pretty business, but it's business all the same, I guess.

SFB? I don't know what that stands for, but I like acronyms. I might start calling them that.

[hollowleg]

oh! Are you the mortician? hey, listen, do you know of any way to dispose of teeth? like grind them up and stuff?

"Stupid Fucking Bullshit". Chris' word for em is echoes but I thought that sounded much too nice

text;

[drama8om8]

Oh my god are you hawking blood over the network? Dead-people-blood? Are you offering dead-people-blood and makeovers in the same fucking paragraph there???????? Because WOW is that ever majorly fucked up holy shit.

 

Oh and sucks about your magical pulse depression? I mean if it helps I guess you're pretty cool even if you're trying to fucking give corpse fluids to people publically, in public. Hearing that should probably cheer you up or something.

[somesayinfire]

When you phrase it like that, it just sounds creepy and illegal. It's a public service. Semi-public. Well, it's a service, I guess.

It actually kind of does, which shouldn't feel as weird as it does. Nice work taking down that scorpion, by the way. I know you didn't need my help, but I'm glad I was there anyway.

[drama8om8]

A CREEPY AND ILLEGAL privatepublic service. Just putting that on the table mortuary dead guy slab where everybody can see it.

And thanks, haha! I WAS pretty badass. I mean you were too. If it wasn't for you then I wouldn't have been able to like. Get my breath back and then fuck shit up! So you are like semi-badass, and then also a second-hand badass enabler. Which adds up to make you completely badass. You're welcome.

[Text | Private]

[healspec]

[oh boy, you can echo back mental illnesses too? like he needed more things in his life to worry about.]

[he is making this a private response because, uhhh, it's kind of personal.]

I can recommend a therapist, if you like.

[Text | Private]

[somesayinfire]

[she appreciates the privacy! on her end of the text, she's smiling in relief.]

There are therapists for echo-onset mental illness? If that's even what this is. I don't know if I want to call it that. It seems like calling it that kind of cheapens mental illnesses.

[Text | Private]

[healspec]

It's as real as everything else that's happening to us.

I think a regular therapist probably will do. "It just started one day" is all you need to say about where it's from.

The one I go to is Rosalyn Clarke, her number is [(###) ###-####]. She specializes in CBT for depression and anxiety. [cognitive behavioural therapy]

[voice]

[moarnomsplz]

Space depression, shun? Why that, and not the normal kind?

[As a probably-alien, Alex's curiosity is piqued.]

text;

[somesayinfire]

Sorry, I can't do the voice thing on my work computer. I was just trying to be funny. Putting a goofy spin on what's probably going to turn into a serious problem for me some time in the near future if I don't get a handle on it.

cellphone. text.

[flamberge]

[Depression, huh? Echo induced or not, depression is still depression and it's a topic Richard knows a good deal about.]

Therapy and medication aside, exercise and certain foods are said to help depressive symptoms, though I cannot say if their effect will be the same given the situation. The best thing you can do is simply force yourself to do whatever it is you must.

[somesayinfire]

Oh wow, thanks. I wasn't expecting so much advice!

Pushing through it is what I've been doing so far, yeah. The last serious exercise I got was running from that scorpion. I could probably stand to do some more. What kinds of foods, do you know?