Seventh Bullet - Video; Laptop

[dyingtohealyou]

Sorry I'm late to the check-in, but it took a while to get back home. I didn't really want to explain to my parents that I got knocked unconscious during the fight, so I told them I was staying with some people who got hurt during the attack to make sure they were going to be okay. Not sure if they're convinced, but at least they've stopped asking questions.

[He runs a weary hand over his face. Going back to his parents' house wasn't a whole lot of fun, but he knew he'd have to eventually even if he tried returning to Roy's place instead. Not only that, he did still worry about how his parents may have fared during the attack.]

Anyway, I figured I should give everyone a heads up. I learned something new about my power in the middle of all of that, and... well, the short and sweet version is, every time I heal someone I have to give up some of my own life. I'm not a hundred percent sure what the full effects of that are going to be, but the last time I gave it a shot I ended up coughing up blood and passing out, so... Unless I figure out a way to not risk dying every time I heal someone, I'm going to have to stop.

Sorry.

Comments

[dead_black_eyes]

It's better to be prepared for the worst than to assume that the best is always going to transpire.

[dyingtohealyou]

[He's not entirely convinced.]

Why bother worrying about something that might not even come true? I've got enough on my plate as it is.

[dead_black_eyes]

If something might not come true, it means that it still might. Even a 1% chance is still a chance.

[dyingtohealyou]

I'd rather not lose sleep stressing about a 1% possibility.

[dead_black_eyes]

If you're prepared for it, you won't lose sleep over any percentage.

[dyingtohealyou]

No, I'm pretty sure I will.

[This is his life we're talking about here.]

Even if it's for the better good, killing myself to keep someone else alive is kind of a big deal.

[dead_black_eyes]

Is there really a better way to die? Everyone has to, right?

[dyingtohealyou]

That doesn't mean I want to think about it.

[dead_black_eyes]

Do you feel better avoiding it?

[dyingtohealyou]

I've said it before: I've got plenty to worry about as it is. So yeah, it's nice not to have to contemplate my own death on top of all that.

[Of course, now that it's been brought up he can't help but think about it, but like he's going to admit to that.]

[dead_black_eyes]

Even if you did die, though... your death would have meaning. Most of ours don't. It's kind of an honor.

[dyingtohealyou]

I hate to say it, but I couldn't care less about honor if I'm going to end up dead because of it.

[dead_black_eyes]

Do you believe in an afterlife?

[dyingtohealyou]

N-

[...He might have said "no" in the past, but after everything that's happened...]

...Reincarnation, maybe.

[dead_black_eyes]

Maybe? This entire experience basically proves it, doesn't it?

[dyingtohealyou]

It's still hard to get used to, okay?

[dead_black_eyes]

Is it really so hard to accept what you've seen proof of?

[dyingtohealyou]

Yes.

[For a while he wasn't entirely convinced the person he was getting these memories from was dead, really.]

[dead_black_eyes]

Then what's easy to accept?

[dyingtohealyou]

You're implying any of this is easy to accept.

Look, I don't know, okay? I try not to over think it.

[dead_black_eyes]

A few people are talking like that lately.

But if it mattered, you wouldn't be talking that way, would you?

[dyingtohealyou]

Then it doesn't matter.

Maybe I'll die because of some stupid freak... thing thanks to this mess.

Maybe I won't.

Either way, I'm gonna try not to worry about it too much. It'll eat up too much of my time.

[dead_black_eyes]

A lot of worriers learn to multitask. You can worry while you're getting things done, just like you can be sick while getting things done.

[dyingtohealyou]

...You actually do stuff when you're sick?

[dead_black_eyes]

Symptoms stop me sometimes. Illness doesn't; if it did, I wouldn't get much done.

Consequences and worrying are probably comparable.