savetheearth | [backdated to late Thursday]

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[backdated to late Thursday] - audio

... Hey everyone. I figured now was a good time to talk about this, given I just realized it's been over a year since I first became a numbered.

It feels like a lifetime ago, you know? I was a completely different person, it feels like. I didn't care about other people, but then something clicked and... I was part of something. Even if the memories I got back were terrible, I finally had people who weren't out of my life before I could get to know them. I wanted to get to know people.

It's been difficult, but... I... I'm happy I became a Numbered. I wish I didn't have someone like Dark Precure to gain the memories of, but everything else... I wouldn't want to go back to how I used to be.

...

I just wanted to get that off my chest. Thank you. Everyone. Again.

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You were a different person, from how you acted then, and from what Lily tells me. You've changed, Jasmine, and for the better. I don't think you could have said something like this in the open, then, and you're more comfortable with yourself, I think. Even the "you" that doesn't have anything to do with Dark Precure.

[There's a pause, and there's a certain change in her voice; is she embarrassed?] It might be a little presumptuous of me, but I'm proud of you. You've come a long way, and I hope you keep going like this.

... Thank you, Winter. That really means a lot to me.

It's kind of strange to think about, but... even if she did terrible things, if she never existed, I never would have found my way to all of you. I'd just be some normal girl.

You don't have to thank me, Jasmine. It's what friends do. And even then... you proved it to me, in a way I hope I can repay someday. Have faith in yourself. You've become more than who you were, and even more than the "other you" was - more than Dark Precure. But you're right, that you need to remember she's there. Remember her, respect her for what she is, and continue to move forward.

Dark Precure is, on your end, what helps us understand each other, when things happen that we don't understand. Or when we have to fight. But it's our friendship, our bonds with each other, that keep us together. I sincerely hope that nothing ever comes between us to test those bonds. I like you too much for that.

[With a completely straight face, in as serious a tone as she can manage at the moment. She's getting better.]

[Jasmine just sits there, listening to this with her jaw hanging open a bit]

... How... how were you not the pink one? I swear to god, you should have been the pink one...

You're doing it backwards, Jasmine. I don't get to decide what color I am, Rikka did. Although... [There's a silence, and she sounds a lot more mischievous when she speaks again.] Maybe I should dye my hair, or get a set of colored contacts. I might be the blue one in truth, but nothing says I can't pretend, right?

... I'm trying to imagine that.

It's a bit weird, not going to lie. But I think you could pull it off. I mean, you got the can-do attitude, and all that. I mean, between you and Lily, one of you needs to be, I think.

I probably could... you know, I didn't have an attitude like that before. It's only since I became part of all this, and met people like you. People that reminded me what I wanted to keep safe. People I can trust, without a doubt.

...I'm not sure I could see Lily in pink, though.

You know what would be even stranger than that?

Me in pink.

... But I see. I'm kind of glad, you know. That... that we could manage to bring something better out in each other. It almost makes all the difficulty and heartache worth it.

You know, it's funny. The other day, I just... decided to try flying, where no one could see me. And for the first time, I took the time to really enjoy it. To take the time and appreciate this amazing thing I could do.

For so long I've had this thing on my back... and it never occurred to me to try appreciating it as something more than just a thing that made me feel like I wasn't human anymore.

[There's a faint giggle.] You'd look really weird in pink. It'd be cute, but I'm not sure you could keep a straight face.

Still... I appreciate everything you've done for me, Jasmine. I'm really happy to have made you as a friend. Even through everything that's happened. I gush about your sister a lot, but you're important to me too, you know.

[At the story about flight, though, Winter vocalizes a considering hum.] Isn't it a great feeling? I don't really get to do it freely, but the once or twice I have was amazing. Escaping the pull of gravity that holds our hearts down... [There's a sudden silence for a moment, as a melancholy feeling passes over her, but it's gone quickly enough.] It's important to remember that, every time we learn, or we feel, or we remember, or we change, that it's not just a reminder of the person we might have been some time long ago. It's also something we should try to accept for ourselves. That we should try to make our own. Don't you think so?

Yeah...! Exactly. That's what I've been trying to get across, I think. That we don't have to look at as being forced to become people that we used to be, that we just have to take their example... or in my case, the LACK of one, and change ourselves.

So even if I've got these horrible memories, even though she's someone I would never want to be... I think I'm better for having experienced things this way. It's helped me become a better person, even if it's by showing me things I SHOULDN'T try to be.

She was really lonely. I don't know how I know this, but... it's the feeling I got from seeing things from her side. It doesn't excuse anything she did, and I'll never claim otherwise, but... it's shown me just what I'd be like if I stayed that way. And how lucky I am that I have all of you.

And... I don't know, Winter. You were the first person besides Lily to make me feel that way. Before Raye or even Marina... So. I'm really thankful for you.

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[backdated to late Thursday] - audio

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