savetheearth | 2nd Sunrise

Huh?

[shou was in the middle of sliding off his shoes and pulling on a pair of thick house slippers when keisuke said that. he looked up, blinked and looked around him. there was the waterfall with a few floating plants running merrily away. there was the furniture, heavy custom pieces with one that was a kind of lounging chair with a skull motif, the long white couch that often saw use as a bed and the custom built bookcases. there was the glass paneling that slid open into a bar area.

and this was just the front rooms.]

Serious about what?

No human being could seriously think buying all of this is a good idea.

[ Maybe it's because he's born and raised in a shitty city in the United States--he doesn't bother taking off his shoes because he doesn't really notice things like customs and that sort of stuff.

That, and Kei's still staring at the waterfall, though his eyes do eventually shift to the skull chair. ]

..And putting it in the front room.. You really are an eccentric rich.

Some of it did come with the place.

[ it belonged to the family but when he moved in, he pretty much went about to create the kind of place he liked, with comfortable furniture like the couch and the skull chair, the waterfall and the glass doors. he just had an idea that is was a little eccentric but he was getting the feeling that most people found his ideas of comfort weird. ]

I guess I am... Everyone says it's a little weird...

But anyways, you've got one of the spare rooms. You'll be sharing the bathroom with Shiro but otherwise it should be okay.

Who?

[ If he's being honest, he's barely paying attention, examining bits of the front room before a hand curls on to a doorknob and he opens it, murmuring his surprise at how beautiful every room is. ] I don't mind--

--Sho, I'm not staying here for more than a little bit.

[ He wheels over, brow raised, voice gentle but firm. He knows that, somehow, he's going to wind up staying here a good long while. Knows it in his heart. Maybe it's an ego thing--maybe it's something else. Being doted on is strange, far more than strange, and his brow rests and he exhales. ]

Let's see that fort.

Shiro's one of us. He's turning into some kinda ghost eater or something and has a tail and a weird voice, but he also is one fine cook. He'll cook an evening meal for all of us.

[shou had a generous heart, something that a few others on the network knew. he also had the time and the money to afford to be generous and that often clashed with his reckless nature.]

Stay as long as you want, leave when you want.

[it would hurt if kei did leave - he had been finding out that people who came to his place to stay and then left had hurt. killian for one, chris for another. he liked people and he didn't want to let them go.]

It's this way.

[he lead kei through the front rooms, past the kitchen and the pantry, through a room that looked like an office, past a couple more rooms - one quite clearly an entertainment area - and then to the bedrooms.]

I sleep at the end of this hall, and you've got the room on the right and this one is where the fort is.

[it was probably the smallest of the bedrooms, but it was completely converted into a fort.]

Dinner sounds good. [ It's a casual remark, one off-the-shoulder, but he's not sure Shou gets him yet. This version of him, at least--he has trouble with words, trouble with finding the right way to express himself. So he stays quiet, lets other people do the talking. This is somewhat of a case--though not to the extreme--so he offers a gentle, almost embarrassed smile.

I'm not actually going to leave.

Idly, he wonders if he can telepathically force it into Shou's mind. He's pretty sure his past self couldn't, either, though. He settles for following him to the fort and sighing happily. ]

I don't think I've ever seen one of these in real life before, na? Do I just go in?

You hungry now? [there was some food in the fridge, more than enough to feed a couple people, but first thing was first - let kei sit in the fort and maybe play a couple songs together or something. shou was sure he left his guitar in the piles of pillows making up the floor.

he couldn't read kei's mind and he never thought he could but he was trying hard not to push it, to make kei stay longer than what he wants. the urge to push was a little odd, but he didn't think about it, instead focusing on the room and it's transformation into something else.]

Really? Uh, sure you can go in... just take off your shoes first.

Huh?

[ He looks down, not really paying attention, and--ah, right. Shoes. He wrinkles his nose, just a bit, and winds up kicking the beat up converse off with ease. It takes him about two seconds to grab his guitar case after that and head on in. The moment he flops down he can't help but give one of the biggest smiles he's had in a very, very long time.

It's comforting, and warm, and nice, and Kei can't remember the last time he'd had a bit of fun like this. He'd found solace in music, in nature and parks. In art, even though he couldn't draw. In the street life. Never solace with someone else, a quiet friendship, but the moment Shou follows him he finds himself relaxing. The smile never leaves his face, either. ]

Wanna jam? You sing, right? [ If he says it, and rakes his tongue over his teeth and bites down, and if he picks up his guitar, maybe it'll be okay, this numbered stuff. This stupid echo thing. ]

Yah, I sing. [kei looked relaxed for the first time in shou's memory, smiling and settled in one of the corners with the fairy lights all clustered together, giving the sheets that make up the top a warm glow. he followed kei in and settles into a spot near him. close enough without getting in the way of the guitar and giving him room to wiggle around if they needed to.

he poked at a few of the soft throws and pillows, finding his guitar and freeing it from the cocoon of sheet; he might have stuffed it there after deciding to fall asleep under the lights in the warm hide-away.]

Can sing, play the piano, koto and guitar and fake my way around a few more instruments.

[he bit his lip, trying not to brag but knowing it sounded a little like bragging. his whole family knew their way around instruments, even his father who sometimes could be talked into playing the sax around the house.]

So? Play. [ Guitar. Guitar is good, and it takes Kei all of half a second to strum a random chord once his own is out, unable to really take his hands off of it. ]

I've always really liked music. It sounds stupid, but.. [ Hell, say it anyway. ] I guess I only really felt connected to it, and nothing else. Does that make sense? Naa--can I smoke in here?

Be careful that you don't start a fire. [shou smokes but he is always careful; a fire would cause a lot of damage, especially if it set off the sprinkler system.]

What's stupid about liking music? It's something beautiful if done right.

[he tested a few strings on his guitar before playing a chord and then thought for a moment about what to play. well... he attempted to think even though what he really wanted to see is if that song was something kei remembered. he had wrote out an accompaniment for it, so as he strummed the notes, he didn't except kei to pick up on what he was doing until he started to sing.]

yuugure ni kimi to mita
orenji no taiyou...

[ He's not sure what exactly he remembers.

No,that's a lie--it's vivid, so vivid he feels like he can close his eyes and be there, smell the ocean, feel the unusually hot rays of sun through a stormy cloud, see him there. It leaves him confused, yes, and while it leaves the perfect sense of being vivid there's also something else.

He's angry.

Kei's angry and anguished and he doesn't realize what he's doing, staring at someone that he should know isn't really there. He's panicking, he feels like everything is going to collapse and the anger ebbs into something else, slides into desperation and loneliness.

Keisuke is used to being alone. It's not something that phases him, it's simply just how he is. A lot of acquaintances, but nothing else. This is a different kind of heart-singing loneliness, one that comes with terror, one that comes with standing on a beach, terrified, shaking. He wants to yell out, wants to say something, but the man watching the sunrise in front of him is singing.

Kei watches the figure burst into flame, and he's not sure if it's real or in his mind, but he tries his best to hold back tears as he watches the sun and his someone, his important person, slowly die. ]

Luka.

[ 'Find another friend.' ]

[what happened here? shou wasn't one to really get that he did something extremely foolish until there were people yelling at him and he was sitting in the center of a mess wondering why. like the time with his father's car after he tried to take it apart, or that time when he broke up with a girlfriend and flipped his motorcycle and he scrapped off the burning tar and skin under it before the medics came and yelled at him. he just didn't realize which made him wonder exactly what was wrong with his mind.

he wanted to share that song. it was stuck in his mind - the beach, the sunrise, the song, and he knew that kei was singing it with him. he could hear that other voice but now..? he wished he brought it up first because keisuke looked scared and a little angry and very very sad, and if there was one thing he promised himself, that was he would take away the sadness in the memories of his special someone.

of his kei.

shou dropped the guitar and reached over to keisuke, hesitating to touch him, biting his lower lip.]

..Kei?

[i'm sorry, don't cry, please don't cry.]

No.

[ He's still staring. The memory--whatever it was--is gone now, but Kei is still feeling the first rays of sun on his skin, still watching that singing, quiet man burn, and the first thing that pops into his head is that fire cleanses all.

But why is he so distraught?

The guitar hits the floor with a muffled thud and that's what causes Keisuke to blink, to finally look over at Shou with parted lips and glassy eyes. ]

He killed himself and I just watched.

Who did? Who?

[he was trying, trying not to grab him and hug away that look on his face, trying hard to not get up and leave because he messed up. he wanted to make sure that keisuke was fine, that the memory wasn't going to make things worse.

but they were worse, weren't they? keisuke had some bad memories, at least from what shou could guess. he knew that place, that city with all those strange people, wasn't a safe place, but he had hoped.

maybe keisuke had good memories some where. he remembered the night on the ocean. there had to be other good memories too.

right?]

...Kei?

Luka.

[ He wants to tear his eyes away from where he saw the other, but he can't. He's in a pillow fort but he still feels like he's on the beach, and he hastily brings the palm of his hand up to wipe aggressively at his eyes. This isn't really him, he has to remember that. This is Kei, not Keisuke. This isn't him.

Then why did it feel so real? ]

I don't know what happened. He was singing, and--and I watched him die.

[shit shit shit. shou reached out to grab his hands, to anchor him in the now. a pulse, an echo of whatever world they tapped in to. a thing where a city was run by man's greed and they were kids just rying to live and he remembered how it hit him during that water-gun fight. at how the world washed out and all he could think and feel was that moment even when he was breathing water.

anchor him in the now.]

Sunrise? Was it sunrise?

[ His attention jars back to Shou as soon as the other grabs his hands, gaze slightly wild, and while there's still confusion on his face he feels like he can actually process it. Slow, but doable.

Focus. This isn't you, it's the other one. ]

I think so. He told me to find another 'friend'. I thought--I thought my world was going to end.

It was sunrise. That song... I knew about it when I saw a sunrise.

[and fire. and a sense of relief from pain. it wasn't happy, but at the same time, it was all over.

what kind of place was that city where death was looked upon as a friend?]

But it didn't, right?

[ He's shaking. He doesn't realize it, but Kei is shaking, and when he looks up at Shou it's with an earnest expression of confusion. ]

I don't know. I--I can't remember, I don't know when any of this happened. Before or after the picture... Before I knew you.

[ Wait. His eyes flutter closed, just for a moment, and he slowly shakes his head. ]

It was before, I think. Because if I had known you, I wouldn't have felt so alone.

Before probably. It can't be after. I don't remember things after the picture.

[a slight lie because he remembers clearly how son drew a gun on him, told him that the pointless slaughter must have been boring to him. his other called it annoying and got up to have a fight.

he didn't remember kei in that, he didn't remember what nudged it, but he did remember how he talked to son about life. he remembered the streets.

he didn't remember when kei came into his life.

shou bit his lip and squeezed keisuke's hand, not to hurt but to show he was there. he would have pulled the younger man into his arms and hug him but he wasn't sure if it would be okay.]

I think you were nearly there for my other...

Nearly?

[ He's not sure what's happening. His emotions are all over the place and there's still that odd hollowness, that off feeling of uselessness that's so odd and foreign to him.

See, Kei? You couldn't even be there in time for whatever Shou's talking about

If he closes his eyes and scrunches them up as tight as he possibly can he can realize that this isn't him, it's the other him, and as soon as Shou squeezes his hand Kei grabs a hold of it, grip vice-like. ]

What do you mean?

[ he held on to kei's hand and there is a moment when he wildly wonders who is trying to comfort who here, even as he tries to keep his thoughts focused. he didn't need to fall into the pit of the past, especially of that past life of his other.

but yet.

some things were hard to keep from affecting him. ]

You weren't there. I was small and fragile and I remember the press of bodies, the screaming and yelling. I remember two older people I had to look at. They were trying to push through the crowds but there was so much smoke and bodies that no one could see.

I remember a corner and an older boy squeezing in with me. I remember those two trying to shield us.

I remember them dying.

[ he thinks they were his other's parents. he thinks that the boy with him was his other's brother. he wasn't sure and he knew that if kei had been there, the crowds wouldn't have been a problem.

kei would have kept me safe.]

Shou...

[ He's being selfish. A part of him wonders if he's always been selfish, and if he's just realizing it now. Maybe it's something him and his other have in common. Maybe it's just his other self.

Maybe it's just him, and for some reason that bothers him more than anything. ]

Shou-- [ He was small. He was small, and Kei wasn't there--and from what Shou's said Kei'd been there for most of his life. He had found a new 'friend,' whatever that meant. It was Shou.

Ah, a voice inside him whispered. You're being selfish. ]

.... Your parents?

It's just...

[ they were both selfish in their own way. no matter who they were, when they were, selfishness seemed to be a part of them. shou didn't like letting go of people. he understood that, it was half the reason why his breakups were always so messy, but this was more.

he wasn't there to protect you all the time.

son. toshi gone - but where - and son telling him they had chosen different paths before they met again in the fallen buildings to fight. and kei wasn't there either.

what happened from the time of the picture to then? ]

I think they were. We were on the streets, and I remember not being big enough to keep up with the other two.

[ He's not sure what's possessing him to do this. The word's bubbling up in his mind, 'selfishness,' that same one that's a main theme running in his other self's memory, but he's not sure he cares. Shou's hurt.

Every instinct is telling him he needs to fix it, and he's not sure why.He just wants to make sure Shou is safe and secure and he doesn't realize he's using his superior speed to grab onto the other's shirt, pulling them in like they'll drown if they're apart, hands vice-like around the other's collar.

He's not sure if it's an act of violence or just that he's desperate, so fucking desperate that Sho doesn't feel this way anymore. He's surprised his grip can tighten anymore, though he's fairly sure he isn't hurting the other. No--they're close, Kei's face inches away from Shou's, and the words come out before he actually realizes he's saying it: ]

That's not going to happen. Anything like that is not going to happen now. I'm going to be here.

[ wha? was going through his mind when kei blurred, grabbing him and pulling him close in a burst of speed that was faster than anything he can do. he knew that his own skills were available for anyone that trained and pushed themselves, but kei was faster than that.

kei was something more.

but that thought was gone because he was so close to him, almost breathing the same air as him, the grip on his shirt tight but not threatening to hurt. shou's eyes widen, his hands reaching up to grasp kei's wrists, but not to pull them away. he just needed an anchor, something and right now he wasn't sure what that was.

he wasn't scared though. he should be; kei could hurt him like this - snap his neck or something.

he wasn't afraid. kei wouldn't dare hurt him. ]

Kei.

[ he felt like curling up against the smaller man even as he swallowed hard, trying to keep back tears. that's right; he'll protect me. ]

Sho...

[ He's positive. He's going to never let anything happen, not after the story, not after watching his 'friend' (and it had been so odd, the way Luka said that--'friend') be so affected like that.

Had he been in his right mind, he'd be pretty sure he'd find this ironic--it was Kei that had freaked out, Kei that had lost control but Sho needed comforting. Maybe it's guilt that made him say it. He doesn't know.

So, carefully, he loosens his grip on Sho's collar. Quietly, he grabs his shoulders instead and gently tugs him into an embrace. He's not sure who needs it more, the comfort, the hug, but it's needed.

And, after a few moments, he begins to sing: ]

yuugure ni kimi to mita
orenji no taiyou...

[ and then he was tugged into a hug and something about it was right. it wasn't his mother, who - and he has to admit it one level - babied him when he was young despite his actions, nor the rarer hugs from his father. this was some guy that he met only through this strange whatever thing the numbers were. he should be pulling away or at least cracking a joke.

but no, this was right and needed and he buried his face against kei's chest, breathing hard because he just wants to cry but that was just weird. he didn't cry; shou usually was the type to scream and throw things or drive his car into the nearest wall. crying was just something he really didn't do.

yet there he was, his throat tight, his eyes burning and that soft voice, that song surrounding him.

after a moment, he joins in. ]

nakisou na kao o shite
eien no sayonara...

[ They sing together, Shou and Keisuke, and he holds the other as best as he can. It gets to the point where he's not sure who's holding up who, but that's fine. It's a temporary solace, a temporary space for them to be them.

It doesn't matter that they're just numbered. All that matters it that they share one thing: each other's friendship. ]

Na, Shou. It's alright now. For both of us.

This is just gonna be a mess, isn't it?

[ shou doesn't move because this does feel nice and safe and warm. while part of him does realize that the pulses were outside of them somehow, a lot of him didn't care right now. ]

Just don't leave me.

[ Kei laughs. It's dry and humourless but he laughs and gives the other a squeeze for good measure. ]

Considering I'd be homeless without you right now-- [ It feels weird, admitting it out loud. ] --I'm not. I'm not leaving you, na?

Thank you.

[yeah no, shou wasn't going to move right now unless he was forced to move. he just wants to snuggle like crazy and looks like kei was going to have to bear with him until he got out of his touchy-feely stage.]

Nnnn. If my other self was here for you...

[ I'm here for you, too. And he's not sure why, exactly, but while his hand smooths the other's back, he places a light kiss to the top of his head. ]

C'mon. Aren't you supposed to be some playboy millionaire?

[ it was normal and right and shou puffed a little at the comfort that little movement caused in him. a soft huff at keisuke's next comment and then he raised his head, the tears replaced by a slight grin. ]

Want me to prove it? [ he leaned up and almost kisses him on the nose. ] Huh?

Wheh-- [ Kei's gonna huff a little, too, because geeze. A little swat, too, and he takes a deep breath. ]

No, we're going to jam. You made a promise, remember?

Meanie. [ shou almost does it anyways but at the swat he just rolls off of kei and laughs, trying to get control over wanting to just lay there on top of him. ]

Fine, fine, we'll jam.

2nd Sunrise | closed

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